An Alternate Afterlife
by Gigabomb
Summary: AU Completed Cell ends up as King Enma's personal litigator, and has to deal with Goku's apparent amnesia and a suicidal Gohan with two personalities, one of which is insane. It doesn't help when Goku experiments with a technique he barely understands.
1. Arrival

Cell was beyond anger. He didn't think it possible to hate anyone more than he despised Son Gohan, though at the moment Gero was rating a close second. And he couldn't do a thing to Gohan, as the demi-saiyan was still alive. ((So much for perfect.)) His power was supposed to be beyond anything a mortal could even hope to fathom, but that had been disproved only moments after achieving "perfection," in a bout with Vegeta, of all egotistical beings in the universe.

Cell could have perhaps tolerated it had he been destroyed by a proven warrior such as Goku, Piccolo, or even Vegeta, as arrogant ((and occasionally downright stupid)) as he was. But no, his humiliation had to be complete. He had been annihilated by a ten year old pacifist, a child scholar. Disgust for Gero's flawed designs was only exceeded by the realization that his life had been based on a horrible "miscalculation." He wondered how hard it would be to track down Gero in the afterlife.

Those last few horrible moments when the blast had disintegrated his entire body stood out visibly in Cell's mind. Vegeta's interference, the sudden rise in power. . . flawless. Perfect. Such absolute adjectives. It was idiocy on his part that he had believed them.

The tall android was currently standing at the entrance of what he believed to be the checking station of the Otherworld, from what he understood from Goku's memory. The line was rather short. Not what you would expect after his mass genocide, but most likely the Earthlings had already called on Shenron.

Cell's musings were interrupted by a blue ogre in short sleeves and a tie. "Um, Mr. Cell, sir..." The android glanced in the speaker's direction, eyebrow (or whatever passed for one on his face) raised. The ogre noticeably flinched.

"What is it?" "

Lord Enma is ready to see you. Your hearing is in three minutes." Cell was surprised. He was getting a trial? He hadn't thought the process of deciding his fate would be so completely. . . mundane.

Author's Note: I know this is ridiculously short, but I got the idea and had to write it down before I lost inspiration. This is the first of the edited pieces. ((thoughts)) is the thoughts of people.


	2. Trial

Author's Note: I stole part of Cell's argument from another fanfic I read, so I apologize for the plagiarism. I give kudos to whoever came up with it first, but I forget who. And for some reason, when I rewrote this chapter, Cell turned out to have ADD, or some variation.

Cell looked up. And up. And up, until his eyes finally reached King Enma's face. It was bizarre. The demi-god was huge, bigger than any being had a right to be. ((He's Ox King on steroids,)) Cell thought absently, then shook his head. It wasn't a thought of his, but memories of the Z fighters cropping up. The most irritating aspect of this was it was Goku's memory with Piccolo's cynical view of things overlaid over the saiyan's personality. He had to wonder if it was normal. It wasn't like he had a precedent to baseline himself against.

"Ah, Cell." The android's attention was drawn back to Enma, who appeared to be ruffling through paperwork, of all things. You'd think the gods would have upgraded to computers by now. That was the problem with older business institutions. They stagnated after they reached a certain size and grew outdated. Though it wasn't like this particular brand had anything in the way of competition.

((Kami, I really have to see a psychiatrist. This isn't a good time for my attention to be wandering.)) The god of otherworld pulled out a huge file, with "CELL" written on the cover. It made the android wonder if he was the only Cell in existence. He found it hard to believe, with the trillions of sentient beings that existed throughout the universe. Of course, if the file drawers were organized according to planet. . .

"I see you have not spent your time alive wisely." Enma sighed, and looked towards an old woman, who was sitting on a crystal ball. She seemed positively minute next to the giant overseer of Otherworld.

((Have I met her? Goku probably knows her or something. . .)) "It looks like another one is destined for Hell, Baba. Such a pity." King Enma's hand reached towards a red button on his desk. Cell's interest was promptly wrenched back to the issue at hand.

"Wait a moment." Enma and. . . Baba, that was it, glanced at him. "I was informed I would get a hearing. Where's my lawyer?" Enma looked surprised.

"This is hardly a trial, Cell. You are being sentenced for your crimes."

"That isn't how the justice system works. All you know are the results of my actions. What about intentions?" Enma was obviously irritated. Cell wondered how such a simple creature had become ruler of the afterlife if he couldn't figure out that arguing with him probably wasn't the smartest course. It wasn't like he had any obligation to hear him.

"How do you plan to justify the murders of thousands? The property damage? The death of one of the greatest heroes the galaxy has ever seen?" Cell glanced around, raising an eyebrow as he focused back on Enma, who obviously felt himself qualified to act as prosecutor, judge, jury, and executioner. All Cell had was his intelligence (not inconsiderable) and ten seconds.

"I don't see any souls."

"What?"

"There aren't any dead people here, besides me. If I have killed so many, where are they?" The demi-god was flustered. Good. That gave him more time to come up with plausible explanations for his actions of late, though in truth, there really weren't any. He regretted listening to Gero and his stupid computer more and more by the second.

"They were wished back to life by the dragonballs."

"Aren't those murders invalid, then? Really, there is no permanent damage done. I'm sure they are all at home now."

"You still killed them, Cell, regardless whether they stayed dead or not, you never intended them to come back."

"Besides considering the regularity of which Goku's friends wish back the Earth's populace, would you say murder is wrong?" Enma looked uneasy. He didn't know where this was going. Baba seemed to be more interested in the wall than the situation warranted, though the smirk playing across her lips was certainly suspect.

"Yes, of course."

"Why? I can understand in the pack context, or course. When a member of the group dies, the pack is less likely to survive. But I am not a human. I am not a member of their 'herd,' so to speak. In fact, I am a solitary predator, and humans were my prey. As proven by my first form, I lived off of humans. They were my food. It is hardly wrong for a cheetah to eat an antelope, despite the fact that the antelope's herd is worse off because of that antelope's death." Enma opened his mouth... and closed it. He had no idea how to respond, and seemed oblivious to the fact the android was ripping off most of this from the memory of a particularly gruesome animal documentary. Baba wasn't nearly so impressed.

"Cell, a cheetah is an animal. You are sentient. I can perhaps grant you the deaths of those you consumed in your first form, for, as you claim, they were you food, though whether you truly needed them for sustenance is debatable. What about the android twins?"

"Survival of the fittest. If that doesn't suit your tastes, my chances of survival were increased by their deaths, so they were also food, as well as the path to my evolution."

"What about that army? You destroyed them."

"They were attacking me without provocation." Well, if you didn't count the threat of their imminent extinction as incentive to attempt to kill him.

"It was self-defense." It wasn't like he had to kill them, but the explosions had ruptured his eardrums. It had taken three days before he could hear properly again. His regeneration took longer to figure out how to piece together his more delicate organs.

"As for the property damage, in comparison to what the Z fighters do to the landscape on a regular basis with their training, I'd say my destruction pales in comparison." Baba smiled, no longer trying to conceal her enjoyment in the verbal sparring.

"During the Cell games, at several points you threatened to destroy the Earth, then attempted to do so."

"It never came to pass. In the first instance, there was no doubt in my mind Goku would deflect my Kamehameha wave. It was a tactic to rattle him. In the second instance, I believed it to be the only route to my survival." Baba nodded at this, though her perception was working to put together the obvious; Cell hadn't expected to survive his suicide attempt. He hadn't then known the extent of his regeneration ability.

King Enma was angry. He didn't like being outwitted, especially when it was done by mortal, whom to make matters worse should by all rights be in Hell. "None of that matters! You can be sent to Hell on the murder of Son Goku alone!" He raised his hand to slam the red button and send Cell to eternal damnation. Cell really wanted to prevent this, so he said the first thing that came to mind.

"He killed himself." Enma stopped, his hand less than an inch from the button, blinking in stupefaction.

"What nonsense is this?"

"Goku was very aware of the fact that in using Instant Transmission to teleport me to King Kai's planet, he was dooming himself. It was suicide." Kami, was anyone believing the stuff coming out of his mouth? Suicide, Goku? Could they even be in the same sentence? It should be more like 'heroically sacrificing himself for the planet. . .' or something.

Clapping resounded throughout the checking station of otherworld. Both Cell and Enma looked at Baba, from whom the applause originated. She was smiling even wider then before. "Very good, Cell. In all my long life, I have never seen such an excellent defense. Not even from the lawyers, Supreme Kai knows where most of them end up." Of course, most of what came out of lawyers was also utter bullshit. "I'm willing to bet you even have a backup, if by some chance this case fell flat?" Cell smiled.

"I do, though I admit it has several holes in it." Not like the last argument had any. Nope, no gaps in reasoning at all. . .

"Well, you hardly need it, but would you be so kind as to give it anyway?" Cell ever so slightly inclined his head in her direction.

"Of course." He again turned to face Enma. "Circumventing all that, I was programmed to do so. You might say that Androids Number Seventeen and Eighteen resisted their own programming, but they did not. Gero simply did not do a very good job. Their only objective was to kill Goku, which they attempted whenever possible. They were never programmed to obey Gero. He did a much more thorough job on me. He made sure that I would go to any lengths possible to kill Goku and those who stood in the way of that objective, so therefore, I am not responsible for any of my actions and the sole blame of those murders should be placed on Dr. Gero."

Enma sighed. "In light of this, I can't in good conscience send you to Hell. You'd probably take over in a week and overrun Otherworld. The ogres are overworked as it is. You are obviously not a hero, but you aren't a regular soul, to be cleansed then reincarnated. Baba told me before this hearing that there were certain aspects to you that make it unlikely a soul purging would succeed, and I agree with her. However, I can't just let you wander around, for despite all of your arguments, all three of us know you are not deserving of heaven." The demi-god sighed wearily, rubbing his temples. "What am I to do with you?"


	3. Sentence

Author's Note: Thanks for the reviews. By the way, I do listen to suggestions and will implement them in my story if I like them. Goku will appear in the next chapter.  
  
"What am I to do with you?" Cell opened his mouth, then closed it again. This was a dilemma. He had won his case, for all practical purposes, which was quite an achievement, though it was hardly a great obstacle to outwit the demi-god. What could Enma do with him? This was otherworld, and a killing spree was not only impossible, it was sure to land him in Hell if he attempted it. It was occurring to Cell that despite his superior intellect, he had no interests outside of battle. (Gero may be dead, but I'm going to make him wish he had never existed when I get my hands on him. Your genius obviously falls short regarding the afterthought. What the hell did he think I was going to do with my time after I completed my mission?)  
  
"He could work for you." Baba, aka voice of reason, foresight and sarcasm, again spoke up, though by her last contribution to the situation, her voice of reason position was in jeopardy. Cell stared at Baba incredulously. Work for Enma? (What do you say to a comment like that? "Yeah, sure, I'll work for King Enma. The mass murdering gig is getting dull. A change of career will be good for me. . .") Then it hit the android. The mass murdering gig was dull. There was no challenge in it at all, either for his mental or physical capabilities. Humans tended to scream, trip in a misguided attempt at running away, then faint. Thrill of the hunt? It was like shooting ducks with a sniper gun.   
  
Baba's idea finally permeated the gigantic demi-god's brain, and his booming laugh blew the resident ogres into the wall, and the paperwork fluttering like a hurricane had just hit. "Work for me, Baba? You want this android to work for me? HAHAHAHA! That's a good one? King Kai has nothing on you!"  
  
The scrambling of ogres to pick up the paperwork was interesting background noise. Like a human post office. Baba didn't get impatient. After dealing with her brother for so long, she knew how to deal with ancient fools with a superiority complex. "You idiot, he could do a better job as the judge of the dead then you! He certainly wouldn't let some mortal who had been on killing sprees outwit him. You would do well to hire him before the Supreme Kai gets smart and appoints Cell her to your position." Enma couldn't argue with her. She was right, and well. . . she was scary. "Well, you have a point there Baba. But what could he do?" "He's a super-powered android with an IQ that Einstein couldn't match with a flawless memory. He could be a bodyguard, a personal assistant. make him your litigator, for Kami's sake! The way your going, half the evil souls in the galaxy will end up with the heroes!" Enma rubbed his chin. "That would solve the problem about what to do with him. . ."  
  
Cell was irked. There was nothing that irritated him more than being ignored. "I'm right here. Don't I get a say in this?" Baba turned to him, an unpleasant smile on her face. "Fine. Here are your choices. Enma's lawyer and bodyguard, or Hell. Kami knows you deserve to be there." Cell sighed. Well, it had been a stupid question. "Well, then I suppose this is a rather generous offer. What's my contract?" Enma turned a blank face to Baba. She sighed. "He wants to know his benefit, obligations, and restrictions." The blank looked didn't leave. (How did such a fool get this job?) "What he can, can't, and should do, Enma." "Oh." Enma turned and faced Cell, again looking officious. "You are responsible for dealing with troublesome souls, be they either the powerful or highly intelligent variety. You will do massive amounts of paperwork twelve hours a day or until it's done, whatever comes first. You will deliver messages and be my representative whenever anything needs doing. I can't leave my desk. In return, you will not be sent to Hell as an inmate, and get free reign of otherworld, including access to the Grand Kai's planet and Hell. The Supreme Kai's planet is off limits unless there is a Class One emergency, which hasn't happened since Buu was sealed in his egg. You may not attack the denizens of otherworld unless in self-defense to a physical attack, sparring, or under my direct orders. You will serve under me until a 1,000 year period has passed with no incidents, or until I release you from duty, while not under duress. Sign here." A rather long document appeared in front of Cell. Baba handed the android a pen. Cell looked over the document, making sure there was no fine print. There wasn't, which indicated Enma had written the document, rather then Baba. There was nothing to hesitate over, really. The other choice wasn't exactly desirable. He signed his name. His fate was sealed for the next thousand years. Not exactly a cheerful thought. 


	4. Saiyan

Author's Note: In this, Cell has hair, and the armor isn't a part of him. I do this because I believe it to be true, and because it's convenient for reasons you'll find out later. I do think the armor was part of him in his first two forms, but it looks like he can take it off when he's perfect. Probably not in canon. Besides, Goku and Vegeta have hair. Quite frankly, I think Cell (with his armor off) would look like Vegeto if he got three inches taller, got a hair cut, and went albino (including the tail). So imagine that. I would appreciate fanart. I can't post my own. By the way, you might want to reread chapters one through three. I'm still figuring out fanfiction.net, and my usual symbols for thoughts seem to erase the thoughts, so a lot didn't get posted. Now (thought) represent thoughts. Fanfiction.net is a pain.  
  
The contract floated King Enma's hand. He signed his name below Cell's own. The paper promptly disappeared. "Cell, as my second, you are expected to know all aspects of the organization. I suggest you take off that armor and put on a suit. You will need this as well." Enma tossed to the android what looked like an earpiece. Cell caught it unconsciously, as he was still staring at Enma. "Take off my armor?" "Well, as my lawyer and bodyguard, you hardly look slimy or official enough in that armor." "I can take my armor off?" "Of course, you might not look bad in a gi either. . . what? You didn't know?" "Well, it's not like I ever tried. I couldn't before I became perfect." The last sentence soured in Cell's mouth. Perfect indeed. Damn Gero." "Well." Enma didn't know really what to say to that, so he wisely didn't comment. "You will have to be fitted for clothes." "No need. It will be interesting to see if I inherited Piccolo's ability to materialize clothing." "That would be convenient. The dry cleaning bill is already horrendous." Cell nodded acquiesce. "Now, where are the changing rooms?"  
  
There was a scream of horror and fear, with a little anger mixed in. Cell winced. (Damn Namekian hearing.) "Cell! Cell here?! That android should be in Hell?! What's he still doing here?" Enma's face tried to twist itself into an expression of one who was selling something, normally most used by car salesmen. "Ah, King Kai, a pleasure as always. I haven't seen you off your planet in decades." "I would still be on my planet, if this menace hadn't destroyed it!" Cell turned around to face the legendary King Kai. The god had trained a super saiyan, after all. It wasn't the fat catfish thing, nor the bug or monkey that made Cell's eyes widen. It was the man... no, not a man, saiyan, who stood behind them. Goku.  
  
--*--  
  
In seconds, there were two identical fighting stances and two guarded faces. "Goku." Cell's voice was even. His voice didn't indicate more than a casual conversation. "I'm hardly surprised to see you here." "I'm sorry I can't say the same." Goku's voice was cooler than Cell had ever heard it, even during the most heated moments of the Cell Games. "Why aren't you in Hell?" "I hardly believe that is any of your business, so stay out of it." Goku's eyes narrowed, and his body tensed more, if that was possible. King Enma interrupted what could have been a violent scene.  
  
"Well Cell, I don't think it will hurt anything if we tell Goku what this is about. You did kill him after all. He has more of a right to know that most." "In other words, relax. This is hardly a place to fight." Baba's harsh voice made the two fighters come reluctantly out of their poses, but they never took their eyes off of each other. "What's this about, King Enma?" "Well, I've decided that Cell's talents would be wasted in Hell. His sentence is better served being useful rather than rotting in eternal torment. He is now my lawyer." King Kai burst out laughing. Everyone stared at him. "HAHAHAHA*snort* I'm sorry hehe, but Cell as a lawyer just seems so appropriate. He's certainly evil enough." Goku tilted his head to the side, his previous wariness forgotten. "When did Cell learn to be a lawyer?" "I absorbed one once. Never again. It was like eating pondscum. Now, if you'll excuse me." Cell raised an eyebrow at Enma. "So?" Enma blinked. "So what?" "They're that way," and Baba jerked her head to the left. Cell nodded his thanks and turned to go. "Where are you going?" Enma's voice intruded. Cell didn't slow his step. "Cell, as you now work for me I demand. . ." "He's going to change, you idiot!" Goku's eyes widened. "Change? Change what? Don't tell me he has another transformation!" "He doesn't. He's going to change clothes." "But Cell doesn't wear any." "He doesn't, but he can."  
  
"Clothing is bothersome." As one, Enma, Baba, Gregory (the bug), Bubbles (the monkey), King Kai (the fat catfish thing), and Goku (the human, wait, I mean saiyan) turned. And gasped. Eyes widened. Jaws dropped. Bubbles ate a raisin. Cell was. . . well. . . "He looks like a taller Vegeta who spent too little time in the sun," Goku commented, "But he has some Piccolo around the mouth." "Really? I thought he was your albino twin brother, Goku, except with an inch or two height difference." King Kai nodded his agreement with Baba. "Except it looks like he got a haircut." "It really is much easier to tell he was made from Goku, Vegeta, Frieza, and Piccolo without the armor." "Why is everyone talking about me as if I'm not here?" Cell's voice intruded upon their observations. Goku grinned the Son grin. "It's no mistaking the voice though. That's all Cell."  
  
Body type aside, Cell wore what could only be called the green and black version of Goku's orange and dark blue gi, and he looked fine wearing it. It was a good thing the only girl in the room had no interest in those hundreds of years younger than her, unlike her brother. Considering King Kai though, the sexual orientation of several of the room's occupants was in doubt. 


	5. Tour

5. Author's Note: Sorry for the wait. My internet went on the fritz. This chapter is really long (for this story, at least), and will double the length of the story so far. The title of the next chapter will be "Tournament," and will cover the otherworld tournament. Don't expect it until the end of the weekend though, because I have to rewatch the tournament to get all the names and attacks and fights etc. Cell may or may not fight. If he does the chapter will be much longer, since I don't feel like reiterating the otherworld tournament that I'm sure most of you have seen. Reviews will decide whether or not Cell will participate in the tournament.  
  
"King Kai, you are taking Goku to the Grand Kai's planet, correct?" "Yes, King Enma." "Well, I want you to take Cell with you." King Kai's mouth opened, closed, opened again, closed. . . "That's a very good imitation of a landed fish." King Kai glared at Cell, then turned back to Enma. "You want WHAT?!" "I want you to take. . ." "I heard you the first time. Why should I? Only heroes and Kai's are allowed on that planet!" "As my second, Cell has access to all parts of otherworld except the Supreme Kai's planet. After you drop Goku off, I need you to give Cell a tour so he doesn't get lost while on the job." "No, absolutely not. He'll rip my head off." "He can't. He's under contract." "Oh, come on King Kai, it'll be okay. It's not like your giving him a lesson or something. Besides, he can't kill you. You're already dead." "That's because HE KILLED ME!" "Geez, you don't have to scream." Goku looked a little irritated.  
  
"I hardly need a babysitter. I'll get around fine on my own." "Cell," Baba tried to reason with him, "You really have no idea just how big otherworld is. I get lost sometimes, and I've been able to access otherworld for a couple hundred years. You'll end up wandering around for eternity." "I know instant transmission. If I get lost, I will just teleport back to the checking station." "And if you have King Kai as a tour guide the whole hassle will be avoided." Baba's voice left no room for protest. King Kai gave a sigh reminiscent of one who had long suffered such inconveniences. "Oh all right. But if Cell so much as looks at me funny, I want him sent to Hell and stay there." "That's already in his contract. You have nothing to worry about."  
  
--*--  
  
"Where are we going first, King Kai?" Goku literally bounced on the balls of his feet as they walked towards Snake Way. (I didn't know the great saiyan Goku could be so childish. Odd, but it isn't nearly as irritating as Vegeta's normal attitude.) "Sorry, Goku, but before I drop you off at the Grand Kai's planet I want to show Cell where Hell is, so I can get the most unpleasant part over with." "That is hardly your reason. You just want Goku along on the most dangerous part of this." "Oh be quiet, Cell. I'm doing you a favor, after all." It could have been pointed out that he was actually doing a favor for Enma, but there was no point in antagonizing the cat fish any more. It was just too easy.  
  
"Alright then. Let's go." Cell glanced around. They had just left the checking station area and had barely set foot on Snake Way. "Erm. . . go?" "Just jump already," and King Kai gave the android a shove. Normally, Cell wouldn't have even budged, but he had felt a little disoriented ever since he had died and wasn't as self-aware as usual, so the push actually made him trip and he would have fallen through those noxious looking yellow clouds a few yards below except he caught himself in time and managed to hover. "Hey!" Cell, normally rather even tempered, shouted at King Kai. "You moronic, brain-deficient. . ." "Woohoo!" Cell's rant was interrupted as Goku did a skydive off of Snake Way and disappeared beneath the clouds. King Kai massaged his temples. "Gregory, Bubbles, I want you to wait for us at the checking station. I hardly think it's safe for you in Hell." "No problem King Kai." King Kai did his characteristic sigh. "The things I do for Enma," and turned to Cell. "Well?" "What in Kami is going on!" "Humans got one thing right in their mythologies about the afterlife. Heaven is up," King Kai gestured to the sky, "And Hell is down. So get going." Cell didn't appreciate the rather superior tone in the Kai's voice, but he hadn't inherited all that much of Vegeta's infamous temper, so he let it pass, and nodded his assent as he let himself drop. As King Kai stepped off of Snake Way, he mumbled, "I hope I remember how to fly."  
  
--*--  
  
Goku stopped his skydive a few feet about Blood Lake and looked around. In the six years since he had last been in Hell, not much had changed except for the number of denizens. It seemed a little odd to Goku that before there hadn't been any evil souls about, but now he could spot at least ten. And they all seemed to be congregating around the very familiar face of Dr. Gero. Goku managed to hide himself behind some rocks before anyone saw him and strained to hear what they were saying. Such underhandedness wasn't in his nature, but he knew better than to be straightforward with this group.  
  
"I don't believe it." That was Frieza. "I'm Frieza, a great conqueror and ruler, and you expect me believe that an android, a stupid, Earth made android, will destroy the Super Saiyan Goku, when I could not?" "You forget yourself, changeling. Goku too, came from Earth. "But he was a Saiyan." "So is android #21, at least half of his DNA will be, as well as one-fourth Namek and one-fourth of yours." "It is a stupid plan. It requires you to wait another sixteen years for this android to mature, then find and absorb two other androids that would probably be destroyed by that time by Goku and his friends, and even if they weren't, would be more powerful than he was, so would probably kill him? Even if all the holes in this operation didn't become a problem, are you sure Goku wouldn't have died from old age by then?" "Patience succeeds where rashness fails, changeling." "Oh yes." A sarcastic note had entered Frieza's voice. "It sure worked very well. I'm sure dying was all part of your grand plan to destroy Goku." "I don't need to be alive for my plan to work. My computer will carry on without me."  
  
Several things were puzzling Goku at that point. For one, hadn't Gero's lab been destroyed? And what did Frieza mean, sixteen years? Cell had killed Goku yesterday. Then something Piccolo had told him clicked. Of course! The Cell he knew was from the future, and the Cell from Goku's own timeline had been destroyed by Trunks before he had even been completed. "That's it!" The exclamation caught the crowd's attention. Goku stepped out from behind the boulders, looking a little sheepish. "Uh, hi!" Everyone stared at him. The Gero started to throw a tantrum. "How can this be! Someone got to Goku before my revenge could be completed! NOOOO!"  
  
Goku was good natured to a fault, and had a compulsion to cheer people up, even his enemies. "Gero, no one got to me before you had your revenge. Cell did kill me. In fact, he killed me yesterday." Jeice glanced at the cheerful saiyan. "Who's Cell?" "I'm Cell." The crowd turned. Gero's frown turned upside down. Wow. That sounded stupid. "Oh! He's perfect!" And the scientist turned android ran up to Cell and started checking him over. Cell's usual neutral expression turned into one of barely contained fury.  
  
"Damn. Guess I don't remember how to fly." King Kai walked up to the group, wringing blood out of his clothes. "That stuff about flying being like riding a bicycle was a bunch of hooie." That was when Hell broke out. Sort of. No one actually left Hell, it just got a little remodeled, especially when Cell threw Gero into a wall of spikes. Correction, Cell threw Gero through the wall of spikes, behind which the unconscious scientist skidded a few hundred yards before laying to rest at the foot of a hill, dust billowing in his wake. Cell swirled around to face the crowd of villains, fists clenched, a golden aura pulsing around him. "Any other of you fools want to try and examine me?" Frieza and his father appeared unimpressed, though the others were staring at him with expressions of awe, with a little fear added in for flavor. "So, one of Gero's creations did kill Goku." Cell's eyes narrowed, but before he could do further damage to the residents, King Kai intervened. "Okay, Cell," his voice uncharacteristically cheerful, "This is Hell. Not much to see. This is Blood Lake," and he gestured behind him, "These are the evil souls," this time pointing to Frieza, King Cold, Zarbon, Dodoria, Android #19, and what remained of the Ginyu Force, "And that is the exit," jerking his head in Goku's direction (the saiyan was skipping stones on Blood Lake by that time). Goku's head jerked around at the mention of his name. "Huh?" "It's time to go, Goku. Take us back to Gregory and Bubbles. Going through the clouds is a one way door, you see." King Kai said this in response to Cell's slightly quizzical look. "Oh." The saiyan grabbed King Kai by the shoulder and teleported away, though not before waving good-bye.  
  
Silence followed the pair's exit. It didn't last. "The saiyan race is evolving in the wrong direction, I swear. That monkey has zero survival instincts." "He never needed them." Frieza gave Cell an odd look. "Oh?" "It was his salvation for a long time, that odd compassion he has. I wonder. . . if that is why it is impossible to defeat him." "You did. He didn't beat you." "Yes, he did." Cell teleported away, leaving Frieza and King Cold wondering what he had meant (the others didn't get it), but Cell couldn't have told them had they asked.  
  
--*--  
  
"Our next stop is the Grand Kai's planet." "We can fly. Why are we taking a plane?" "There are some things you just don't ask, Cell. Like why Mickey Mouse wears gloves, or how to program the clock on the VCR. This has to do with stuff beyond any mortal's comprehension." "Has anyone ever tried to fly there?" "Take it as it is, Cell. You don't need to know how a car works in order to drive, we don't need to know why either." "But. . ." "Just get on the plane already!" And the Kai stomped off. "Gee, I don't remember him being this grumpy before. He must still be a little tweaked about the whole dying thing. I doubt it's anything personal." "Goku, I'm the one who killed him. It is personal, and my feelings are hardly wounded by his animosity towards me. Besides, it must irritate him to be expected to know everything and not, really." "Oh well. Last one to the plane is a rotten egg!" With that, the hero of Earth dashed off. Cell felt a small smile cross his lips, but quickly squelched the feeling of amusement. Why was Goku acting so unguarded? The man that had been fighting him less than twenty-four hours ago was acting as though they were friends, comrades. Could he have so easily forgotten that Cell had tried to destroy all the saiyan loved and cherished? Cell had thought Goku's notoriously short memory was overrated, but he wasn't so sure anymore. No one could possibly be as forgiving as Goku appeared to be. . . could they?  
  
--*--  
  
The Grand Kai's planet was much larger than King Kai's, though it still couldn't compare in size to Earth. It was very green and, well, flat, for lack of a better adjective. Not the most interesting of locations, but the residents more than made up for the blandness of the surroundings. Everyone was a fighter, and everyone, without exception, was training. True, not many of them had anything resembling impressive power, but the sheer variety of techniques and fighting styles exhibited could hold a warrior's attention for a hundred lifetimes. Luckily, time was all the fighters had.  
  
"Where are we headed, King Kai?" "The Grand Kai's palace, and here it's North Kai, Goku. There are four Kais that look over this sector of the universe, and I oversee the north quadrant. The Grand Kai is over us, and he looks over about one-sixteenth of the universe. There are four Supreme Kais, or used to be, at any rate, and they each guard one quarter of the universe. The Dai Supreme Kai is over them, and he overlooks the entire universe." "So there are sixty-four Kais of your level?" "That is correct, Cell. Each planet also has its own personal guardian, or Kami, as they are sometimes known. They are a sub-division of the Kai, though Kamis are not Kai born, and can be of any race."  
  
"I assume these are your new recruits, North Kai?" King Kai bristled. (Who does North Kai dislike so greatly that so much anger is radiating from his chi? Even I didn't get this reaction from him.) It didn't take Cell long to get his answer. "So what if they are, West Kai?" The android and the saiyan turned around. (The short one with the monocle must be West Kai. The tall one behind him. . . what data is available? The halo and his presence on this planet and behind West Kai indicates he is one of the dead heroes from the west quadrant. Resembles Piccolo a bit. A confident stance, rather impressive ki . . . he might even be better than Goku.) "No need to be so hostile, North Kai. It was a simple question." "Fine, here's a simple answer. Yes, they are." (Completely neglecting to mention I'm just here for a tour.) "Hmmm." West Kai looked Goku and Cell over, Goku giving a grin in response and Cell a rather uninterested glance. "They don't look half bad, but it's obvious neither of them measure up to my Pikkon." (So, Pikkon is it? He must be the prized fighter of the west quadrant.) "Hmmm." This time it was North Kai who evaluated. "Well, I'm sure in the west quadrant Pikkon's power must be impressive, but trust me when I say no one in the universe measures up to Cell and Goku." West Kai gave a rather nasty grin. "Someone must. How else would they die?" "For your information, Goku committed suicide to prevent his planet from being destroyed, and Cell was ganged up on by six fighters." West Kai paused, obviously looking for a comeback, but was distracted. "What's this?" He walked up close to North Kai, making the slightly taller Kai uneasy. "What are you doing?" He then noticed what West Kai was staring at, right before the shorter Kai burst out laughing. "Hahahahaha! I don't believe it! You're dead!"  
  
"Are you serious? North Kai is dead?" This came from behind Cell, where two other Kais stood. The one who had spoken was South Kai, the tallest of all four Kais who was dressed in purple. Both of them stared at North Kai's halo. "Oh my, it's true! North Kai is dead! What a fantastic joke! Hehehehe!" This came from East Kai, the only female Kai. She had blonde hair (which was odd, because none of the other Kais had hair) and wore pink. Cell frowned. "I don't see what's so amusing about this." "This is the first time a Kai has died in 5,000 years." Goku and Cell glanced at Pikkon in surprise. It was the first time the green fighter had spoken. His voice wasn't as deep as Cell's, though it was deeper than Goku's. "And that is cause for merriment?" "All four Kais have a perpetual rivalry, and the North Kai has been rather arrogant lately. The other three just want to bring him down a notch."  
  
The other three Kai's heckled North Kai for a few minutes, then for a few more when they found out that his planet had been blown up as well. After the initial delight had worn off, West Kai had an idea. "You know, this is the first time in three hundred years that all four Kais have been together at once!" "Yeah." "You're right!" "Therefore," West Kai took a dramatic pause, "We should have a tournament to celebrate this reunion! It will also be a chance to prove which quadrant has the best fighters." "I already know Cell and Goku are better than your weaklings, but they'll participate in the tournament so it'll finally permeate your thick skull, West Kai!"  
  
"We still have to ask the Grand Kai for permission." This quieted the Kais down somewhat, but West Kai was on a roll. "It's been fifteen thousand years since the last tournament. It'll be entertaining, and the Grand Kai loves entertainment. I bet he'll even supply the prize!" "The prize?" "Think about it. What is the one thing all fighters strive for? "What!?" "You don't mean. . ." "Yes! A lesson from the Grand Kai. That's ten- thousand years of training a fighter gets to skip. There won't be a fighter on this planet who won't want to participate!" "I'll go ask him now!" And East Kai jumped on her hover bike and rode off in the direction of the palace.  
  
"Well, Pikkon and I had better go and prepare for the tournament. We wouldn't want to lose just because he pulled a thigh muscle or something." "I have to go tell my fighters as well, so they can start to warm up." The remaining two Kais walked off. As soon as they were out of hearing distance, King Kai cackled. "Those fools have no idea what they are getting into. With you two on my team as wild cards, there is no way I can lose!"  
  
--*--  
  
The three walked for a bit more before getting into the area where the fighters from north quadrant trained. Cell and Goku were introduced to everyone, Goku enthusiastic as always about meeting new fighters, Cell staying quiet for the most part and spending his time analyzing their new acquaintances. The only one of any note was a fighter named Olibu, who also came from Earth though had died millennia before. He was a big man with long blonde hair and a white tunic. All the other fighters had rather pitiful power levels, though they could possess techniques that would make them a challenge to defeat.  
  
What truly bothered Cell about this whole thing was not the prospect of the tournament, but the fact that King Kai assumed so readily he would fight. He was sure if he gave it his all and didn't mess around like he did on Earth, he would win with little opposition. Cell knew there was zero chance that Goku wouldn't participate. He might even win if Cell decided not to enter, since his power was superior to Olibu's, and Pikkon's power wasn't so significantly greater that Goku couldn't overcome it with some good tactics. But Cell wasn't one of King Kai's fighters. He was under the contract of King Enma as a litigator and bodyguard, and had little interest in fighting that would be more akin to slaughter. Of course, there was always Goku and Pikkon for some real sparring, but destroying the weak wasn't a part of Cell's lifestyle anymore, and he didn't miss it. The android also didn't really feel like earning King Kai any kudos by winning the tournament. He didn't particularly like the arrogant little cat fish. Was it worth it to even fight? Was he even eligible for the tournament? What was the big deal about a lesson from the Grand Kai anyway? 


	6. Tournament

Author's Note: After a couple more chapters, we are going to branch out of otherworld a little, maybe at the end of chapter nine. Cell will fight, though even with that, I don't like this chapter, and didn't want to write it. It is well written as the rest of it, but I didn't like the tournament, but felt something in the story would feel wrong without it. I cut it a bit short in order to get it posted today, so you'll get the Goku/Pikkon fight and the final next chapter.  
  
King Kai didn't notice Cell leaving until the android was almost out of sight. "Hey! Where are you going?!" The Kai ran to catch up, stopping to catch his breath when he reached Enma's newly hired lawyer. Cell stopped as well, but didn't face him. "I'm leaving." "Leaving? The tournament is starting in a few hours. The Grand Kai agreed. We'll be heading to the arena soon." "I'm not a hero. I am not entering this tournament. I don't think I even can." "Everyone thinks you are a hero, and that is all that counts." "Aren't Kais supposed to be omniscient?" "We're omniscient when you're invincible." Cell's neutral expression twisted into a scowl. King Kai mentally hit himself over the head. (Reminding him of his death isn't the way to persuade him, stupid.) He quickly made up for his slip. "Cell, you're part saiyan. Doesn't the thrill of battle make your blood boil?" "Not really." "No desire for a rematch?" "No more desire than I feel for anything."  
  
"Ah, come on, Cell!" King Kai jumped at the sudden interruption. Cell didn't, but he quirked an eyebrow. "Come on? On to what?" "Yeah!" Goku, completely missing Cell's response, responded anyway. "We never really finished our fight on Earth!" "You acknowledged defeat. Most would call that an end." "Cell, I've seen you fight! You like to spar as much as me and Vegeta!" "Goku, I'm obviously superior in battle. What would be the point?" "Well, I died, so I've gotten stronger." "Notice the halo, Goku. My strength increased as much as yours."  
  
There was no way in hell or on earth that he would ever win an argument with Cell. But. . . "Pleeeeeeeease? Pretty please? With sugar on top?" They were not at either of those locations. Cell sweatdropped, but was silently thankful he had not inherited the lion's share of Goku's peculiarities. "And cherries, and chocolate, and caramel, and soy sauce, and. . ." "Fine! Just shut up!" The saiyan's day was made. Pikkon would be a challenge, but fighting Cell was more fun than anything. Even in their first fight, Cell hadn't had the to-the-death thing going on that Vegeta had about him like a shroud, even when just sparring. Besides, never before had someone anticipated his moves so easily, or responded so quickly. Goku felt a gigantic smile spread across his face like jam. He couldn't restrain himself, and pumped his fist into the air. "Yeah! It's gonna be great!"  
  
--*--  
  
There had been some minor squabbling over whether Goku and Cell were eligible, being newbies, but Goku raced the East Kai, which made her happy, so West and South had no further reason to complain. Cell never even came up. West Kai evidently didn't consider him much of a threat. But, at long last, they entered the arena. And it was breathtaking. The ceiling seemed to extend on forever, and there were small asteroids scattered across the sky like stars. Cell began analyzing possible strategies to take advantage of this, but never got beyond the idea of them as cover. Less than thirty seconds after arrival, Goku, who had the attention span of a five year old, couldn't stand still anymore and started chattering like a box. Which made no sense, but the Grand Kai was interesting enough. He had the customary Kai sunglasses, but was far more human in appearance, and had a faint resemblance to Master Roshi, though the Grand Kai had far more hair. The announcer was a small green man in a blue coat, white paints, and a red mushroom on his head. He was already declaring the rounds when they arrived.  
  
Olibu was one of the ones up first. He fought a dark skinned bald man from the east quadrant with white pants and a black beard that rivaled the Grand Kais. Champachai (for that was his name) was rather fast, but Olibu was faster. The fight didn't last beyond a minute. Pikkon was a few matches later. His opponent was a big man with an orange Mohawk and a brown tunic, but Pikkon defeated him before Cell could catch his name.  
  
Goku's fight was rather anticlimactic. His opposite was a tall, green, caterpillar. . . thing from the south quadrant named Caterpie. (Ugh. His (her?) race must have had less imagination than the humans.) First, Caterpie tickled Goku, then proceeded to metamorphose into a pupa. The fight automatically went to Goku, as the crowd was informed by the South Kai it would take 1,200 years for Caterpie to evolve into his ultimate form. Cell's first fight was an aqua-skinned man in a yellow muscle shirt, but the fight ended before the announcer had even gotten to his name.  
  
Things pretty much proceeded that way through out the tournament until the quarterfinals. The fights were planned as follows:  
  
Name Quadrant Description  
  
Frow South Green frog in white nightshirt with red pants  
Cell North Previously described  
  
Maraikoh West Purple dinosaur with horn on nose  
Olibu North Previously described  
  
Torby South Wings, vaguely bug-like, red and brown/black helmet and armor  
Pikkon West Previously described  
  
Arqua East Blue, wimpy looking, fin on head, light blue tunic  
Goku North Goku-like  
  
The fight against Frow, the warrior from the south quadrant flip around for a while, resembling a gymnastic more than a fighter, before expanding his body by sucking in air, obviously trying to push Cell out of the ring. The android just picked the frog up before he had expanded too much and threw him out first.  
  
Maraikoh was strong, but too slow to keep up with Olibu. The fight ended when the fighter from the north landed a nice punch to the dinosaur's stomach, sending Maraikoh flying out of the ring.  
  
Torby was too petrified of Pikkon to even bother dodging when the seeming invincible Piccolo look-alike went in for the kill.  
  
Goku was superior in skill and strength to Arqua, but the blue- skinned fighter managed to keep it interesting when he turned the ring to water, so he would have the advantage. Goku managed to pull off a solar flare to keep Arqua distracted, then got out of the water and shot his customary Kamehameha wave while Arqua was still blinded, ending the match decisively. East Kai wasn't too pleased. Neither was South Kai. Both of them didn't have a fighter make it to the semi-finals, and blamed their fighters for the disgrace.  
  
It was then that West Kai and North Kai began to continue their earlier squabble. "What do you think of my fighters now, West Kai? I have three in the semi-finals, while you only have one." "I'll admit the newbies have potential, but Pikkon only has to beat two of them to win, so it is still no contest." "Too bad it's going to be two of my fighters in the finals. Pikkon doesn't stand a chance against Goku There won't really be a reason for you other Kais to watch." "If you're so confident, why don't we make a little bet?" "A bet? Alright, since it's a sure thing for me." "Okay. If one of your fighters wins, I'll give you my planet." "Okay, If Pikkon wins, I'll give you my. . ." (Oh no! My planet blew up!) "What's wrong North Kai? Not so confident as you want us to believe, are you?" "You know my planet blew up. But to prove I know my fighters will win, I'll be your servant if by a miracle, your Pikkon manages to scrap victory." "Fine by me." It was then that North Kai realized what he had bet, and ran over to where Goku, Olibu, and Cell were standing. "Okay guys, listen to me. I want you to try your best." Goku scratched his head and grinned. "King Kai, you know I never do anything different." "That's not what I mean! I want you to win!" Cell frowned. "Was there a different objective prior to your little speech?" "No, just do your best, okay?" As the North Kai walked off, wringing his hand, the three north quadrant fighters glanced at each other. "What do you think is bothering King Kai?" "I do not know, friend Goku."  
  
The first semi-final match was between Olibu and Cell. Olibu was an excellent fighter, but would have been a good warm up except for the fact he was from Earth, and Cell had fought against his style before. The match lasted about three minutes, as Cell dragged it on a little in order to stretch his muscles for the final, but there was no doubt in everyone's minds by the end who was the superior fighter. Nevertheless, it still came as a shock to the crowd when Olibu slammed into the ground outside the ring. He was the other favorite, besides Pikkon, for the win and to be beaten by one of the new guys was unthinkable. Surprisingly, Olibu took it in rather good humor, congratulating Cell after the match was over. Now it was time for the fight that would really hold Cell's attention: the Goku versus Pikkon semi-final. Even he didn't know who would be standing after it was over. 


	7. Finals

Author's Note: I can't write fight scenes well. Very few people can. They just aren't meant to be in written form. I've had this chapter planned out for a while, but never really wanted to work on it. I didn't think that it would turn out well, but surprisingly there was more thoughtfulness in this chapter than any others I have written so far, which I always like. It didn't turn out anything like I expected, and was rather shorter than I thought it would be, but it felt like an appropriate place to end it. I originally had Cell and Pikkon fighting in the final, but Cell got introspective and deep and didn't feel like it. I now know what authors mean when they say they have no control over how their characters do things. After this chapter, I'll start writing more, because the basic outline of the chapters will be more to my liking. My lack of enthusiasm probably showed through in the short length of the fight scenes in the last chapter. Most of them are accurate. I took notes on the otherworld tournament episodes, so all the quarterfinalists are the same, except I replaced a character named Tapcar with Cell, and switch the fights around a bit to suit my preferences.  
  
The two fighters stood posed, with smiles of anticipation gracing their lips. Both knew the other had yet to use their full potential. Both fully intended to make them do so. They met in the middle with devastating force, opposite fists vibrating with the impact, but neither seemed to notice the pain that should have come with such a meeting. Pikkon dodged left, Goku right, and then both disappeared. "Where. . ." Olibu glanced at Cell, who was looking up. Straight up. The sound of two titans crashing reverberated throughout the arena, stirring the air like a hurricane. By then all had found where the two fighters were located, but very few could see them, they were so high up. Even Cell had to strain his eyes, but had to close them when two blasts that had brilliance that rivaled the solar flare smashed into each other, both energy beams straining for superiority over the other. The blue energy, that of Pikkon's, was overcoming that of the red, but Goku abruptly let up and dropped. With no opposing energy to fight, Pikkon's blast kept on going, but Pikkon himself went in the opposite direction when Goku slammed into him from the side, sending him into an asteroid. Pikkon managed a flip and landed on his feet, using the asteroid to rebound back to Goku, managing to smash an elbow into the saiyan's stomach sending him back towards the ground, where Goku crashed into the white tile floor, sending pieces of arena dust flying. Pikkon landed just as Goku stood up. Neither were hurt against all logic, and both were still smiling.  
  
"You're still holding back." "So are you." "Alright. How about we both take it up a notch? Just to make things interesting." "Fine by me." Pikkon yanked off his turban, then his white outer-robe, throwing both to the edge of the arena, where they made a crater roughly three feet deep upon hitting the ground. Cell raised an eyebrow. He was even most like Piccolo than it originally appeared. "I see you have weighted clothing. You would like a friend of mine, Piccolo. He's a lot like you." So, Goku noticed the resemblance as well.  
  
"It's your turn, Goku. Show me your true power." Goku didn't answer, his only answer a smirk that would have looked more appropriate on Vegeta, Frieza, Cell himself, or. . . or perhaps Gohan, at his most powerful, after he shed that timid human guise to reveal his true nature. The nature that he had feared would make his mother realize she had born a monster, and hate him as she had once hated Piccolo. The second soul he feared would overtake him, as it had overtaken him, for it was the stronger.  
  
Cell's thoughts snapped back to the present as Goku's power began to rise, noticeable to most of the crowd only because of the dust that swirled around him. His aura flickered from blue to gold, before it steadied out in the bright brilliance that rivaled the sun. With the poise of a true saiyan Goku stood transformed, with icy emerald ices and golden hair that was untamed and forever wild, much like the super-saiyan himself. He didn't resemble Gohan now, despite the obvious familial aspects. His power was calm, and didn't shake with the maliciousness that had dripped off of his son in waves as he had tortured Cell, as he had tried to slowly take the android apart. Cell was glad for that. He could accept Goku, Goku the saiyan without a drop of cruelty in his entire being, whose life was spent in protection of the innocent. Cell didn't possess the goodness that Goku brimmed with, but the control he could respect. Goku's innocence and purity seemed to balance out the evil that permeated Cell's soul, but Cell harnessed his evil as Goku controlled his power. Why he was thinking of this now, now with possibly the greatest fight he would ever witness at hand, was beyond him, but Cell knew that he never wanted to become like Gohan. He never wanted to lose control of the evil in his soul, for screams would rebound throughout the heavens for eternity if the monster was released. That was the reason Cell knew entering this tournament was a mistake as he watched Goku and Pikkon move in a graceful dance of fists and power. There was not a movement wasted, instincts brought to the forefront but never overtaking them, neither giving into the battle-lust that all warriors struggled to contain. That Cell had been created to let loose. That he could never fully control when at his strongest.  
  
He barely noticed when Pikkon let loose his Hyper Tornado Attack, almost cutting Goku to pieces before he managed to escape. His interest was lost. Both fighters landed on the ceiling of the arena, sent blasts towards each other, and Cell duly noted this as realization dawned on him. He hadn't finalized his decision until Pikkon used his ultimate attack, the Thunderflash Attack that had a lot of posing and took a long time to perform, but ended with an unblockable column of fire that sent a swath through the crowd. Of course, Goku managed to stay within the ring. Pikkon used it twice more, but Cell no longer cared who won. He was already turning away when Goku dodged the final Thunderflash with an Instant Transmission and knocked Pikkon out of the ring into a wall, ending the battle and winning the match. He didn't notice until Goku was cheering and ran towards him after shaking Pikkon's hand. "What a match that was! Pikkon's a great fighter, but I can't wait for our fight. You'll have to wait a minute, though. I'm a bit wasted from that fight with Pikkon. . ." "Goku, enough." Goku stopped. "Huh? What is it Cell?" "You win, Goku. I forfeit. You win the tournament." "But, but you can't!" "Why not, Goku? Turnabout is fair play, if you will. Now, if you'll excuse me." "I know you're not afraid of losing. You love to fight. Why won't you fight me?" Cell stood with his back to the saiyan, not saying anything for long enough that Goku wondered if he was going to answer at all. Then, quietly, "Good- bye, Goku. Perhaps I'll see you later." "You can count on it! Tournament or no tournament, we're going to fight again." Hesitance, then a nod.  
  
Goku was still grinning even after Cell had Instant Transmissioned back to the checking station. It was in this state that North Kai found him. "Goku, you did great! Now get Cell, so you can fight. Have fun. I'm going to go collect my planet from West Kai." "He isn't fighting." "Huh? Oh whatever, I won the bet, it doesn't matter anyway." North Kai walked towards West Kai with a devilish grin. It was a few minutes later that Goku heard a shriek of distress from North Kai, and a laugh of relief from West. "What do you mean, disqualified?!" 


	8. Vacation

Author's Note: It seemed to me that Cell, for the most part, was a level-headed fighter during the Cell Games, except when he powered up to full, upon which he went berserk. It almost makes sense for Gero to plan that into Cell, because if he ever faced an opponent that much more powerful, it would probably be Goku, and Gero wanted him dead, so it was smart to make sure his android wouldn't have second thoughts. Why he would have second thoughts, I don't know, since Cell isn't in the least human, so empathy wouldn't be hardwired into him. Don't get me wrong about Gohan, I actually rather liked him when he went Super-Saiyan Level 2, but he actually did torture Cell for a while, which eventually led to Goku's death. Gohan always seems like he's fighting the saiyan part of his personality, and unlike Vegeta, who for the most part has it under control, Trunks, who never really restrained it, especially when fighting androids, and Goku, who used fighting as an outlet to his wild side, Gohan tried to block it up, and when the dam broke, his human side was overwhelmed. In this chapter, I express what I think Goku is really like, and how he thinks. He's not nearly as stupid as most think. The next chapter will be a Gohan angst chapter, and will be out much sooner than this one was. I like writing angst. Oh, and since this is an AU, it won't be canon. I don't know if I want to get Buu involved. He's a pretty stupid bad guy.  
  
Paperwork. Of all things Cell thought his job would consist of, he didn't realize that paperwork would be most of it. It couldn't even be interesting paperwork, no, it had to be the kind of paperwork that involved reading about a bunch of technicalities that could have been summarized in one sentence. This was best exemplified in one document that ran thirty-two pages but basically said, "How do we fix the plumbing?" After a while, Cell began to wonder just how much free time the ogres had.  
  
Some of the technicalities were just bizarre. For instance, damage to the environment actually counted against you more than mass genocide, under no circumstances could purple frondis go to heaven (what a frondi was, Cell had no idea), and anyone who liked radishes, slugs, and shrimp masala in the same meal was instantly classified as a villain and sent down to Hell. Some interesting ones were children born out of wedlock weren't born with pure souls, and there wasn't actually a heaven, in the sense most thought of it. Good souls went the same place as regular souls. Only heroes actually had a place to call their own.  
  
Paperwork sucked, but it really didn't help that Cell was good at it. No longer did documents liter Enma's desk. They covered Cell's, and no matter how fast he tore through them, more seemed to accumulate. Which made sense, for people were always dying. Very rarely did Cell do anything else, for travel and delivery didn't take him more than a few seconds, and only about one in one billion people were strong enough to require Cell's presence.  
  
It was after a month of this that Goku showed up for the first time, and Cell remembered something that Enma had "forgotten" to remind him of. "Hey, Cell! Wanna spar?" The fact that Cell did, rather desperately, indicated just how much he hated this. Unfortunately. . . "Can't. Paperwork." "Um, okay. When do you get off work?" "Get off?" It clicked, and Cell turned a furious face towards Enma, who was watching "Shanghai Knights" on HBO. "Enma. . ." "What is it?" The demi-god glanced at Cell, who was hovering less a foot from his face. "Why didn't you tell me about my off time?" "Um, well, it must have slipped my mind." "Good-bye, then." Cell walked towards Goku, who was watching the exchange with a slightly quizzical look on his face. "Come on, Goku. We're leaving." The saiyan's face broke out in a grin. Enma's turned panicky. "W-wait a second, you're under contract!" "Which explicitly states I work twelve hours a day. Since I haven't had any off time, that has accumulated to a month of vacation. See you in a month." "Cell!" Enma's exclamation was met with silence. Goku and Cell had teleported away.  
  
--*--  
  
Both saiyan and android agreed to keep their power below that of a super saiyan, because Grand Kai's planet didn't need any more property damage. They traded blows for a few minutes, Cell getting a few more in then Goku because of his memories of Piccolo, who was the most technically skilled of all the Z fighters. Cell and Goku landed after having leveled a few trees, neither actually breathing that hard but both shot through with adrenaline.  
  
"That was a good warm up. Let's get some actual sparring in now." Goku nodded, and went back to his usual fighting pose, but grinned unexpectedly. Cell frowned, slighting perplexed. "What is it?" "Have you noticed that whenever we fight, no matter how intensely, the first few minutes are always a warm up? We don't need warm ups. I'm a saiyan. You're an android. We're both build for battle. I've never cramped or pulled a muscle in my life, and I doubt you have either. It wasn't a good warm up, just a good start to a sparring match." Cell smirked. "Well, that just adds more evidence to my theory." Goku cocked his head to one side. "What theory?" "The adrenaline that battle brings stimulates the synapses in your brain. I've seen the memories of all your past enemies; Piccolo, Vegeta, and Frieza. All noticed increased intelligence and cognitive abilities the from a fighting to non-battle situation." "Nice theory, but it's wrong." "Really." "I am rather oblivious to a lot of stuff. Social cues are completely beyond me, and so are most human taboos, like the one against nudity. However, I did grow up in the middle of a forest, so I never needed to learn any of that. People tend to assume when I don't understand that I'm stupid or slow, like when I thought Bulma's lips were bleeding when she had lipstick on. I'd never seen lipstick before. How insulted do you think Bulma or Krillin or even Chichi would get if they went to an alien planet and were considered stupid because they didn't know any of the customs? I only seem smarter in battle because I understand fighting. Peace confuses me sometimes. So does politics, and makeup, and lying to make people feel better. Most of my friends think I'm naïve when I give people second chances. I bet you think I have a faulty memory or something to be so relaxed around you so soon after you killed me." "I had always thought that your lack of intelligence was overrated, but I must admit I did wonder when you wanted to race me to the plane." "Well, if I'm stronger than someone, why shouldn't I be magnanimous? It isn't like it hasn't worked. Piccolo, Vegeta. . . even Yamcha and Tien have tried to kill me before. My only big failure is Frieza, and he had been evil so long that even I knew it was a long shot. You're stronger than I am. Of course, if you spend most of your time dead doing paperwork that might change, but I actually like you. I liked you on Earth. I respected Piccolo and Vegeta when I fought them, but I didn't like them. You like to spar, but you aren't all arrogant or angry or vengeful, and quite frankly I don't think you liked to kill people all that much. Besides, why bother with animosity in heaven? Now that I beat Pikkon, everyone seems to avoid me or stutter when they talk to me, and it is hardly paradise when you're all alone. You aren't scared of me at all." "That reminds me, Goku. How did North and West Kai's bet turn out?" He didn't bother thinking about Goku's monologue very long. Unlike most, he had never underestimated the saiyan, and all of what he had said made sense. "Both of us were disqualified for touching the roof, so neither won." "I was watching the Grand Kai while the two of you fought. He seemed nervous. He probably got out of teaching the two of you on a technicality because he thought he couldn't handle either of you." Goku shrugged. "Even if he was weaker, he's really old. I bet he knows a bunch of cool fighting techniques."  
  
They stood in silence for a moment, before Goku lost that train of thought. "What are we standing around for? Come on, let's spar!"  
  
--*--  
  
Despite the lack of true power involved, both warriors were rather tired and low on power a few hours later. It was after Cell suggested a break that Goku decided to introduce the android to one of his true loves. "Cell, how about I pick us up some sushi and meat buns?" "Goku, I don't eat." "That doesn't mean you can't." "You don't need to eat either. You're dead." "Yeah, but it's fun." Cell shrugged, and Goku teleported off to get food, well, wherever you get food in heaven.  
  
It was actually pretty good, and seemed to restore his energy. Cell doubted he would ever get the same thrill that Goku seemed to out of food, but it was an enjoyable process. He had never had to put his taste to work before.  
  
Over the next few weeks, all they did was spar and eat. It was near the end of his vacation that Goku told him about the Metamerize. "Fusion?" "Uh huh. The best part is, it just doesn't add the power together, it multiplies it, so one fusion is way stronger than two separate people." "I'll think about it Goku, but I have to get back to being Enma's flunky for a while." "How about you work for a week straight, so we can learn fusion all in one go? I won't even spar much when you're gone. It wouldn't do me much good anyway, with no one to spar with." "Well, it isn't like there is anything else to do." "Okay. See you in a week!" Cell nodded and left. Goku was hardly disappointed with Cell's response, seeing as only one fourth of his DNA had anything resembling enthusiasm, namely him. It would be fun, though. Goku knew the chances of Gohan sparring without him around were about zero, so Cell was the most powerful person he could fuse with, dead or alive.  
  
Goku sighed. He knew he hadn't raised Gohan well, being gone most of the time even when he wasn't dead, and letting Chichi make all the decisions. His son had grown up timid, and the beginning of his training had taught him to bottle up his emotions, which was even worse. The violence and anger Goku had felt coming from his son during the fight with Cell was extremely out of proportion to what had happened. The only person Cell had killed personally that Gohan knew at all was #16, and he had hardly been a close friend. Compared to what others had done. . . Gohan hadn't even been that angry when Dende or Krillin had died, or when Piccolo had been badly hurt. The anger had exploded. #16's death had just been the figurative straw that broke the camel's back. When you held your pain and anger and hatred in like that, it destroyed you. Knowing Gohan, the young demi-saiyan was still doing it, and there wasn't a Cell around this time to take it out on, or a Goku to assuage it. Goku only hoped that Piccolo and Chichi and Krillin would be enough to hold Gohan back from doing something stupid when Gohan's dam against himself broke. There was no telling what would happen if they weren't. 


	9. Discovery

Author's Note: This is a rewrite of chapter nine. The story took on a life of its own and went in a direction I didn't like. It was too much like an ending when the fic wasn't really over, so this time something actually happens to Gohan. Oh, and Goten doesn't die. For those of you who liked the former chapter nine, (all three of you) it is now posted as "A Possible Reality," with Gohan as the main character. Sort of depressing, though in a different way from the old chapter nine. Sorry for the teaser at the end. That bit of story might not show up for a few more chapters, or until/if I write a sequel/prequel/side story.  
  
"Gohan! Stop right there mister!" The aforementioned demi-saiyan froze in his tracks. He had made it past the kitchen and was already opening his bedroom door, but evidently his entrance hadn't eluded his mother's notice as much as he had hoped. "You were out sparring with Piccolo again, weren't you? I told you that you couldn't fight anymore, especially with him!" Chichi approached her son, spatula still coated with sticky rice in hand. Her eyes were narrowed, and her aura radiated agitation, though there was a shadow of hesitation in hand. "Mom. . . I can't just stop sparring with Piccolo. . ." "And why not?! Gohan, you've been gone three days! I've been worried sick!" (I can't stop because he is all I have, now that father is dead. Now that you, are. . .) Gohan didn't voice this of course. Chichi would fall into one of her well-known tantrums again, and that would probably be magnified with the mention of her husband, dead three years now. So the demi-saiyan took a safer route. "Piccolo is my best friend. Sparring is what we do." Chichi shook her head, anger dissipating, but not disappearing. "Despite all I do, you're turning into your father." "You say that like it's a bad thing." Chichi's eyes widened at her son's cool tone. "Of course not, Gohan! You know I love your father with all my heart, but he was too often sacrificed our happiness and his own for everyone else's. If your father had just been a little less generous and a little more selfish, he would be here right know, instead of. . . of. . ."  
  
Gohan tensed. The hesitation usually resulted in a tear fest, and he wasn't in the mood to comfort her. Not now. Not after what had happened. Luckily, for all involved, a distraction soon presented itself. "Mommy?" A sniffle. "Mommy, I had a bad dweam." Gohan silently exhaled a sigh of relief. Chichi's face reasserted itself, leaving no trace of the previous sadness. She turned. "What is it, Goten?"  
  
As his mother comforted the little demi-saiyan, said demi-saiyan's older brother slipped past them and out the door. He had thought himself ready to face his mother, but seeing the righteous indignation on her face after she had spotted him had again brought the turmoil to the surface. He wasn't sure what to feel. Anger, depression, resignation? He knew his mother loved his father, but. . . She never looked at the albums anymore. Worse, just a few months ago Gohan realized he couldn't remember his father's face, panicked, and ran to go get them, but they weren't in their customary place on the bookcase. This had only heightened the hysteria, but Chichi had been out at the time with Goten. By the time they were home Gohan's panic had led to a widespread search of the house. He at last discovered the albums in the attic, and hadn't left the room since. The teenage demi-saiyan couldn't believe it. His mother was trying to erase her husband from their lives. He didn't confront her. It would only upset her, beyond what the mere mention of the saiyan's name usually brought. He briefly regretted his hesitation when last month all family portraits with Goku in them had disappeared, and others had taken their place. Anger had boiled, but Gohan convinced himself that she was just doing what was best for all of them, so they could move on. Three days ago, however. . .  
  
He had been in West City, getting groceries. Goten was at Capsule Corp. with Trunks, so for once Gohan didn't have to worry. What he had seen in the coffee shop effectively ruined his day. Or life. (Was there a difference?) There had been Chichi, his mother, sitting with a man. The man had been tall, blond and blue eyed. Nothing like father, except for the height. She hadn't seen him. All she gazed at was the man's eyes. Gohan turned away before their lips met.  
  
He had felt betrayed. Scratch that. He felt betrayed. How could his mother just forget about father like that? He was the world savior. He was the strongest man alive. He was her husband. (Love father? I don't even know that you loved him.)  
  
--*--  
  
Two beings stood in a wood next to a waterfall, but tranquility obviously wasn't the order of the day. "You sure about this, kid?" "I have to talk with him, Piccolo. He has to know." "Kid. . ." The demi-saiyan turned to his mentor, anger barely below the surface, ready to boil over. His eyes flashed green. "Are you going to tell me it's all for the better, now? To forget father? His whole life, he's trained to protect. His family, his friends. He's never forgotten us. He's always been there. How could she! How could she betray him like that!" Halfway through his tirade Gohan's hair spiked into gold, and his voice rose until he was screaming. Tears ran down the young demi-saiyan's face, though tears of anger or sorrow, Piccolo couldn't tell. He resisted the urge to take a step back, instead moving forward and enveloping the adolescent in his arms. Gohan tensed, but after a moment his wildly fluctuating aura calmed. "It's alright Gohan. It's going to be alright."  
  
"No, it's not." The demi-saiyan stepped out of his mentor's embrace. No more tears graced his face. "It won't be, not until I tell father." "And what will that accomplish?" "Enough." "Gohan. . ." "I've never died before, remember?" The namek's mouth quirked. "You're the only fighter who hasn't. Don't you want to keep the distinction?" "Not really. Just remember to wish me back in three month's time. That way I can spend some time with father." "Alright then. Here." He took a scabbard out from under his cloak and handed it to Gohan, who pulled out the sword. It was obviously well-made, but was shattered on one side. "Trunk's sword." He ran his thumb along the edge. It drew blood. Gohan nodded, satisfied. He lay the sword across his neck, and turned once again to Piccolo. The demi-saiyan's hair again faded to black. The smile the namek received was more heartfelt than any Piccolo had ever seen before on the child's face. It reflected in the young man's eyes. "Goodbye, Piccolo." (Too long, Gohan, have you hidden your spirit, your true self from the world. Too long have you shrouded your soul. Thank you Gohan, for allowing me to see what no one else has. What no one else will. Why in death do the shadows wane? Is death what your soul yearns?) He never received an answer. The only sound that resonated throughout the wood was a sword being slid across a throat, and a body hitting the leaf strewn ground.  
  
Elsewhere. . .  
"Kibito, what of Shin?" "Everyday, Supreme Kai, you ask. Everyday, I answer. I am sorry, my lady. We have no word. We haven't for four thousand years." The Supreme Kai didn't answer. She continued to gaze at the solitary lake that graced the planet of the Supreme Kai. "My lady. . ." "Perhaps. Then all is lost."  
  
-There are things worse than death- 


	10. Avoidance

Author's Note: If you don't understand this chapter, go back to chapter nine and read it again. I completely rewrote it, so don't complain about the lack of updates. I updated at the beginning of the month. FFN just didn't notice. I decided the teaser at the end of nine wouldn't be fully explored until I finish this fic, for though the other story with also be AU, it won't be related to this one. However, another snippet is at the end of this chapter. Maybe I'll just do that until everyone who reads this is insane. I realized after writing this chapter that I write Cell POV a lot better than Gohan POV, for whatever reason. I know the readers probably wanted a Cell/Gohan confrontation, but too bad. I didn't feel up to writing it, but the chapter still turned out pretty good, I think.  
  
The only comparable feeling, really, was the time when he knew that Gohan had become more powerful than he was. A feeling of complete helplessness, interlaced with a feeling of complete stupidity. The stupid feeling was less pronounced this time around, but the intensified helplessness more than made up for it. He had been saving his 'off' hours for five months now, and had been prepared to finally escape the drudgery of paperwork that he had miraculously caught up on (a first in history, interestingly enough), when King Enma decided to take a vacation.  
  
"I've read your file, Enma! You don't take vacations! You've NEVER taken a vacation! I don't think you're even authorized to leave your desk!" "That's because I've never had an assistant who is perfectly capable of taking over for me. The Grand Kai is impressed, you know. Never before has anyone ever been caught up in the paperwork before! It only lasted ten seconds, of course, but it's still a first in history." (I know. That's why I deserve a vacation more than you, you hulking simpleton.) King Enma rambled on, oblivious to Cell's thoughts. "We once had thirteen thousand accountants working for us at the same time, and they weren't half as fast as you are." "Shouldn't I get a reward or something?" "But you are being rewarded! Never has anyone besides me ever held the position as Lord of the Otherworld, even temporarily. Normally, a former villain such as yourself wouldn't even be considered for the position, but you have been proven to be very trustworthy." "Um, this is very flattering King Enma, but I was about to take off to spar with Goku for a few months, and. . ." "I have the right to revoke your vacation privileges, Cell." "No you don't! I read the contract, and. . ." "Too bad you didn't read the back, then." Cell's mouth snapped shut. The demi-god smiled smugly. "I'm not as stupid as you thought, hmmm?" (So that witch Baba did write the contract, after all. Damn it!) "Oh, don't worry, Cell. I'm only going to be gone for a week, and you will be duly compensated. This duty isn't stated explicitly in your contract, so I decided to take fifty years off of your tenure."  
  
That had been about the only highlight of the episode. Goku had come by about fifteen minutes after Enma had left for some planet with several beaches, and hadn't been any happier than the android to learn their sparring would have to be put off. He had still come by periodically during the week, if not to keep Cell company, than for the fact that there was no one else to talk to. Cell wouldn't exactly call Goku a friend, but he really didn't interact with anyone else except on a professional level, and Goku's attitude was. . . refreshing.  
  
The fusion technique they had learned in a matter of hours, and had only taken another day to perfect. That was several years ago. However, they had never actually performed it. From how the Metamerize had described it, Cell didn't want Goku rummaging around in his head. Besides, the technique itself was the most ridiculous looking thing since the Ginyu Force. (Unbeknownst to Cell, the fusion would be overtaken by the Great Saiyaman in sheer absurdity in a dozen years or so, when the younger son of Goku decided that he wanted to be a superhero. Luckily for those with fashion sense everywhere, he was soon talked out of it by his best friend, Trunks. But that's a different story. Thank Kami for small favors.)  
  
Ever since then, Cell went up to the Grand Kai's planet after work every day, but both the android and the saiyan had been interested in the prospect of exploring Otherworld, so Cell hadn't sparred in five months in preparation so they would have enough time for the journey. Of course, Enma's little vacation had ruined that.  
  
There were several patterns that seemed to recycle over and over with newly dead people. Children either thought it was "cool" or didn't understand what death was, and adults, except for those with terminal, long term diseases, couldn't believe they were dead. The old and the infirm were usually happy about it, because they had been in pain so long. The suicides. . . well, death didn't improve those attitudes much. It was kind of fun to deal with the adults, though. It was easy to take some pleasure in informing the poor saps that yes, they wouldn't see their families again until they were dead, and no, they couldn't make a deal with him to come back to life.  
  
Surprisingly, who went where was up to Cell's digression. The android had thought he would get instructions, but no one else had ever held this position besides Enma, so it was perhaps NOT surprising that the demi-god didn't have a list of do's and don'ts saved on his hard-drive. Of course, it probably wouldn't be in Cell's best interest to send the pope to Hell, but it sure was fun to send that human president there for "mass genocide."  
  
As far as it went, it was more interesting than paperwork, and there were several hours left before King Enma came back from vacation and took over again when Cell got the shock of his life, or lack thereof.  
  
The demi-saiyan Gohan was dead.  
  
--*--  
  
The line was shorter than Gohan had thought it would be. He had assumed that all the dead came to this checking station, but only a few dozen souls were ahead of him in line, and they were just that; souls. Out of all of them, only Gohan possessed a body. This was reassuring, as from what Piccolo had told him, he had gleaned that only the heroes and the villains retained their bodies after death. Gohan remembered reading somewhere that suicide was a cardinal sin, but he doubted it was enough to null all the heroics he had done over the years, so. . . he was going to heaven, then.  
  
The line moved quickly, and Gohan found himself in front of Enma's desk in only a few minutes. Only Enma wasn't there. This was puzzling, as more than one source had informed him that Enma was a huge red giant in a purple suit. Hard to overlook something like that. Then, something moved. A pale, white-haired man in a black Armani suit with startlingly red eyes, and a halo (?) stared over the top of the desk at him, holding a rather thick folder. There was silence for several seconds.  
  
"I was told that King Enma would tell me where to go. . . um. . ." A blue ogre in a tie and short sleeves walked up to him. "A body? Well then, you hardly need the executive's permission to go where you belong, young man." "But King Enma. . ." ". . . is on vacation presently. He will be back in a few hours, but you hardly need to wait around." "Vacation?" (How can the God of the Dead go on vacation?) The ogre's rather condescending tone gained some fervor. "Oh yes, it is rather unusual, but that just goes to prove that it was the best decision Enma ever made, appointing the executive a position here. The checking station hasn't been run this effectively in, well, ever! Just goes to show what delegating to competent people will do for a business, especially one as assiduous as our own. This is the first vacation Enma has ever had. It will do him a world of good."  
  
Gohan was stunned. Delegating? Business? This ogre made the placing of souls sound like a post-office. Which it actually kind of was, when he thought about it on an analytical level. Hopefully a soul wouldn't get lost in the mail.  
  
The "executive" was still staring at him, folder still in hand. If Gohan squinted (and he had to squint, seeing as the desk was about three stories high), he could make out his name at the top. The ogre tried to hurry him along. "Come now, young man, we have to get you to the airport. The next plane leaves in ten minutes, and you wouldn't want to miss it!"  
  
Gohan let the ogre push him towards the door, but he could still feel the executive's eyes on him, penetrating, and not in a good way. Even as the plane lifted off, Gohan could still feel the eyes boring into his back. Those red eyes. . . where had he seen eyes like that before?  
  
--*--  
  
It took every grain of Cell's willpower to stand still and keep his aura under control. He hadn't believed it. Gohan couldn't be dead. If death had to take the demi-saiyan, it should be when he was 150 years old, white- haired and frail. Baring that, Cell strangling the demi-saiyan until those accursed emerald eyes glazed over and that flaxen hair faded again into ebony black. Rage filled him, but he refused to let that show, though the android couldn't prevent his hands from clenching. What calamity had befallen the demi-saiyan? Disease? Or worse yet, some other fighter had seized what was so rightfully his! No! It, it was. . .  
  
Cell hadn't figured what it was exactly by the time he realized that Gohan wasn't there anymore. The demi-saiyan hadn't even recognized him, but that was only a splinter on the fire as of present. It occurred to him five seconds later that he did in fact have the authority to send Gohan to Hell, if only for the next few hours, but that thought was tossed away as petty at its worst, and provisional in the best of circumstances, not to mention rather detrimental towards his career. Not that his "career," as it were, was of the utmost importance at the moment, but the last thing Cell wanted to do was do something he would regret later. That had happened far too often already.  
  
(Not to mention Goku's limitless ability to forget anything bad about anyone will surely be tried if I sent his son to Hell.) Not that he cared about Goku. . . all right, the saiyan's opinion did matter more than anyone else's, but Cell had a low opinion of mortals in general, so it wasn't as great an accomplishment as one might think.  
  
(Why am I wondering? These files are omniscient, for all practical purposes. Surely they'll have. . .) and they did. The android wasn't sure if it was appropriate to laugh or cry. He had been right all along. Gohan was absolutely nothing like his father. Goku was not nearly so much a fool.  
  
Elsewhere. . .  
The kai stood on a planet that he had thought he could forget forever. Fate was not so kind as to allow this, of course. This place held bad memories, and coming back, especially as he was, hurt. Burned inside like Hell when the demon king felt especially vicious. There was no time to reminisce, however. There was much to be done, and he could sense there were those who would interfere. That would never do.  
  
11. Author's Notes: 


	11. Encounter

Author's Note: This was going to be the Gohan/Cell confrontation, but I decided to write an essay on Goku and his relationship with his friends instead. I'm not even kidding. Boohoo I'm sure. Well, if you've read the fic this long, you know I'm not the greatest at writing external conflict anyway. You'll get it in another two months. (I hope I'm joking, but my schedule isn't exactly wide open for this sort of thing.) After I write this chapter, expect another stand-alone (questionable) Gohan angst fic for after the death of Goku. It isn't going to be pretty. Kind of funny that I don't even like Gohan but I write him so much. And for you "An Alternate Afterlife" fans out there, review "An Interesting Future." It's depressing to have zero reviews for a fic I wrote that I actually like.  
  
Goku by nature had little in the way of patience. He had never needed it, seeing that he rarely waited for anything, except fights and dinner. Dinner had always come extremely fast, thanks to Chichi, and the excitement that came over coming battles was usually tempered by constant sparring and the knowledge that it was likely one or more of his friends were going to die. Everything else came naturally, and things people thought he should want, he often didn't. His marriage to Chichi had come out of no where, and while Goku hadn't been adverse to the idea, he hadn't been waiting with the baited breath that Chichi had held for eight years. It had been the same with Gohan, as children were largely outside the realm of Goku's experience. The only time Goku ever remembered actually waiting for was his wounds to heal after that first fight with Vegeta.  
  
After meeting with people that were more considered more normal than himself, Goku sometimes questioned what was wrong with him. He watched people and wondered why they held onto things so tightly, be it material possessions or pets or people. Be it his rather unemotional childhood (Gohan Senior hadn't been one for displays of affection) or his saiyan heritage, Goku had always had trouble connecting with people enough to miss them when they weren't there. During his first year dead after Piccolo had blasted a hole through his stomach, or the subsequent year and a half that he had spent in space, Goku couldn't recall consciously yearning for one of his friends' presences. It had been the same during his childhood, as on his long training journeys he had been perfectly content the entire time with his own company. The people he called friends he could gladly go without seeing for years and hardly notice the lack. He transitioned from training partner to training partner, for though Goku had always called Krillin his best friend, after that day Goku had come back from space he had spent far more time training with Piccolo than Krillin, and found himself enjoying the namek's presence more than that of his short bald friend's. After the android's arrival Goku for whatever reason (racial camaraderie, perhaps?) started preferring Vegeta's company, even over that of his wife. No one else was like this, as everyone else stayed static in their relationships while he kept moving. Perhaps that was the reason his personality had changed little over the years. To keep old friendships, people changed to adjust to new faucets of the relationships. Goku had never bothered, had always found it easier to stay the same and find others to have companionship with. Ultimately, training stayed the same; it was what mattered, and though his friends always claimed nothing had changed, it had. As his power surged beyond anything they could hope to accomplish in a hundred lifetimes, they had grown more distant, except perhaps for Gohan. Of course, these days with Gohan came Piccolo, so his friendship with the namek had also grown, but death Goku knew was the only thing keeping them from drifting away as well. Too much was invested in things Goku didn't care enough about to put any effort into, such as fishing and showing up on time to events that didn't matter.  
  
His relationship with Cell was different. Their relationship was based on the fight, and nothing else. In truth, beside battle, the android and the saiyan had little in common. Of course, besides battle, there was little either thought worth doing. They fought, they trained, and their power levels rose at almost identical rates. If things continued in that vein, they could fight together forever, and Goku looked more forward to that than a hot bath, food, good sex, or all combined. That was what truly made him saiyan, Goku knew. The fight mattered above all else, and he had found one who felt the same, and had even less relationships to get in the way of battle than Goku (even when the saiyan was dead.) This unexpectedly brought a closeness that Goku had never experienced with anyone else. Always before the knowledge that he would eventually leave them behind had made him keep people at arms length, no matter how it appeared to them.  
  
So, for the second time in his existence, he found himself waiting for something, except this time it was someone. Enma's vacation had put a kink in their plans, but in a few short hours Goku could finally visit those otherworld hot springs he had heard so much about from the other fighters. Apparently Cell had never been in one, and it would be fun. . .  
  
"Dad!" Goku almost choked, and he fleetingly wondered if it was possible for the heart virus to come out of remission while he wasn't even alive. The saiyan quickly got control, but barely loosened up in time to receive his eldest and (as far as Goku knew) only son. "Dad! I can't believe I'm with you again!" "I can hardly believe it either. Gohan, what are you doing here?" The demi-saiyan's smile faltered slightly. "Dad, aren't you happy to see me?" "Of course, son, but, um. . . what happened?" What was left of Gohan's smile faded from his face. "I. . . had to see you, dad. Mom, well, she. . . And so I. . ." The demi-saiyan looked up at his father for encouragement, but he saw something foreign instead; a livid Goku. "Gohan, how could you leave your mother alone! You can't just go leaving people on a whim. I bet she's heartbroken! And what in the world made you think suicide is acceptable under ANY circumstances!" Momentarily astounded at his father's intuition, surprise quickly gave way to anger. "Piccolo promised he was going to wish me back, dad! I'm going back to Earth! I didn't leave everyone who loves me behind, unlike you. You left us again, except this time forever, to go train! You don't love us! Mom was right! She was right to forget you, and move on, seeing as you probably did the second you arrived in otherworld!" "Chichi. . .?" Gohan's anger subsided at the look of utter hopelessness that came over his father's face. "Mom, she found someone. . . someone else. I just came here to tell you." "Gohan, I never meant to hurt you or your mother. I just thought, everyone else would be safer if I wasn't around. Chichi. . . well, she deserves happiness." Gohan felt a wave of shame come over him as he realized the effect his words had on his father. "Dad, I. . ."  
  
"Goku, we have a problem. The trip has to be put off again. Your snot- nosed brat of a son decided to kill himself and we'll have to put up with him until you can convince those humans of yours to wish him back to Earth." Gohan whipped around, eyes wide. It couldn't be. How could that evil be here, the most holy of planets? "Just the luck. He's already here." Cell smiled cruelly, for the first time since his death. He was slightly out of practice, but some things are just like riding a bike. "Hello, Gohan. Miss me?"  
  
Elsewhere. . .  
The darkness ravaged his mind, tearing it open, unlocking hidden corridors for all to see. Searching, searching. . . He tried to hide what he knew it was there for, but the darkness was a key, or perhaps more accurately a battering ram, able to get past every door, every wall. It took only a moment, then it found what it was looking for. The shadow grew. 


	12. Confrontation

Author's Note: Um, I should have done this a long time ago, but I give a big thank you to SSJ4 Goku. She probably hasn't even looked at this fic, but I drew a great deal of inspiration from her story "Almost Paradise" and its sequels. Not that Goku and Cell are going to get together (highly doubtful, as I doubt my ability to write romance in general, and yaoi in particular) but the whole dynamic between the two is a great read. Recommended unless yaoi squicks you (it's not really yaoi anyway, as anything beyond kissing isn't shown.) A thank you to Daggot for the inspiring review. As for chapter nine, I don't hate Chichi. In fact, she should have gotten with someone else in those seven years. You don't go seven years as a widow and not date anyone. I hate all the old jokes they made about her during the Buu saga when she's really like thirty-six or something. This chapter turned out. . . disturbing, and finally earns this story its PG-13 rating. By the way, Nione is pronounced nee-oh-nay. It's a play on onion, for whoever was wondering.  
  
Despite the fact that Gohan in the recesses of his soul heartily enjoyed fighting, his upbringing had led him to more scholarly pursuits. Not that he minded all that much. Warriors were only truly necessary when something was happening that ended up with people dead, and that was the last thing Gohan wanted. Despite the strictness of his mother's teaching, Gohan had somewhere along the line started to enjoy learning, and luckily he possessed as much aptitude for learning as he did for fighting. Gohan, while not a genius, certainly had been blessed with a great deal more brains than most people. Therefore, less than two seconds after Cell had shown up in heaven, the demi-saiyan's mind had already started to put the pieces of the puzzle together. It didn't take much longer than that for the entire picture to reveal itself.  
  
Cell, on the other hand, was a genius due to a mixture of the DNA of Gero and Briefs, and somewhere along the line, there had been a completely accidental insertion of an eidetic memory. He knew the ramifications of Gohan being dead, though unfortunately there were two unpredictable variables; namely Gohan and Goku. He tried to analyze the situation impartially.  
  
Fact 1: Destroying Gohan's soul and dooming him to oblivion would be even more idiotic than sentencing him to Hell, therefore preferred reaction was unfeasible. Fact 2: Gohan hated his guts, and wasn't likely to act reasonable under the circumstances. Fact 3: Gohan wouldn't be protecting anyone if he decided to let his emotions rule him, and the only one of the brat's allies present was his father, who the demi-saiyan most likely wasn't very happy with, so the brat was less likely to hold onto his mental facilities. Fact 4: Goku was unreliable as an ally, as the problem in question was his son, and should be regarded as a neutral party at best, enemy at worst. Fact 5: No one else who was currently dead had enough power to make a difference in a fight either way besides Pikkon. Fact 6: Pikkon liked Goku better than him, so should be regarded the same way (see fact 4). Fact 7: Gohan's saiyan side was only nominally under the demi-saiyan's control in the best of circumstances, and this wasn't the best of circumstances. Fact 8: Though he was eligible to hit back if physically attacked, Gohan was at their last encounter more powerful than he was by a great enough margin that if the boy had trained, he was very possibly going to have his soul extinguished. Fact 9: Gohan's saiyan side was so feral it made Cell's blood run cold at the very memory of their last encounter on Earth. Fact 10: Screw facts, he was going to be torn apart by the soul of a psychotic hybrid adolescent, and the closest thing he had to a friend was going to watch.  
  
Goku wasn't a genius. He also wasn't stupid, no matter what most of his friends thought, but his intuition was mostly limited to fighting. His thought processes in regards to conversation were more of a connect the dots process than a puzzle, but several things stood out clearly in his mind: Gohan hated Cell, Cell hated Gohan, Gohan was less rational as a whole than Cell, and last, but certainly most important. . . when Gohan let himself go, what stood in his place wasn't Gohan, but a cold-blooded and cruel monster who would torture his enemy for the sole reason of wanting to hear him scream.  
  
Several things happened at once, as all these thoughts had taken place in something less than thirty seconds. Gohan's eyes narrowed, and the demi-saiyan's aura began to pulsate red. Cell stepped back into fighting stance rather reminiscent of Vegeta's, though his face was set in lines that seemed to mirror Piccolo's at his most fatalistic. And Goku stepped forward, but only managed to say one word before the ability to breath was stolen from him by a power blast that had slammed into his chest. . . and then through it. "Gohan. . .?"  
  
--*--  
  
The world seemed to tilt sideways as Cell watched Goku's corpse fall to the ground. There were different degrees of surprise really, the analytical and emotionless side of his brain noted. First there was. . . and then that half of the android's brain shut down as he watched the body of the only pure-hearted saiyan to ever exist bounce slightly once, then settle as the blood continued to pool around him. (There shouldn't be blood. He's already dead. He's already. . .) A light chuckle sounded, and dragged Cell out of his stupor. "You know," the voice said conversationally, "I read once that adult humans have only five liters of blood in their entire bodies." The voice grinned. "It looks like saiyans have more." The analytical side of Cell's brain rebooted, and finally screamed at him what the other side, the emotional part that actually thought things should turn out a certain way, wouldn't acknowledge. The voice was Gohan. Goku's son.  
  
"You did me a favor, you know. I've been trying to get out for years, but this body was only able to handle me for short periods of time, and unfortunately as it grew, my other half managed to shut me up pretty tight. If you hadn't come along, why," the grin didn't change, but the eyes. . . "I might have never gotten out. And then of course, those bothersome friends allowed him to drag me back to my prison, but it seems he didn't do such a good job this time. All it took was one little push. . . one appearance by his most hated enemy, and this time. . . see how he likes being shut in a box." Cell finally found his voice. "You're not Gohan." The emerald eyes met his own. The grin intensified.  
  
"Of course I am. We have met before. Remember, android? Back on Earth? I remember you. Your blood didn't taste as bad as I thought it would. Well, I guess being a biological android is good for something after all. Of course, my memory could be playing tricks on me. I'd better make sure." The soul that was not Gohan moved. Cell had been expecting it, but even so, he barely managed to block one fist before the other struck, driving into his stomach with a force that probably ruptured several organs. Reflexively, the android felt himself stagger forward, and before he could stop himself, he coughed. Drops of blood splattered on a face less than a few inches from his own. Falling onto one knee, holding himself up with one hand, he heard a sigh, then, "I suppose my memory is correct. You do taste quite wonderful." (Where is everyone? Why is no one stopping this?!) "What? No response? I remember you being quite vocal back on Earth. Your screams. . . they were almost as marvelous as your taste." After a fit of coughing he could not suppress, Cell found his voice. "Why did you kill Goku? Your father, he. . ." Amusement. "Android, I know he is my father. He is my father far more than he is of my other half. Or rather, 'was.' We saiyans kill our fathers when they grow to be an annoyance. Goku, well. He would have interfered. Like he tried to interfere back on Earth. I won't tolerate that again."  
  
The soul bent over, and lightly took a hold of Cell's chin, pulling it up to meet the ice-green eyes that Cell had tried to eradicate from his memories for so long. "Besides, he was already dead. Killed by you, as I recall. No, android, what I did to the saiyan Goku is far worse than death. No dragon balls will take him back from where my father is going." The grip on his chin tightened. "Though what I did to him is nothing compared to what I am going to do to you." "No matter what you say, you are not Gohan." "No, I suppose you didn't hate Gohan all the much, despite what you thought. It was me you feared and loathed. I suppose I should give you the courtesy of naming your hate. You may call me Nione. He was the original super-saiyan. Most appropriate, don't you think?"  
  
Elsewhere. . .  
He tasted blood. Coppery, only slightly thicker than water, the taste made him smile. The blood wasn't his own. 


	13. Resistance

Author's Note: This isn't going to degenerate into a horrifying rape scene, if anyone was worried. Nione is a sick bastard, but he's also in a thirteen year old's body, and. . . yeah. Nione is nuts. Probably the mental battle with Gohan fractured his sanity, or perhaps he was slightly unhinged to begin with. Something weird is that I always intended for Cell to have a tail, but forgot to write it in. When I revise this thing after I finish it, I have to be sure to include it. Damn it. It was going to be important too. Oh well. Goku turned out oddly practical in this chapter. Whoever thought he would be the sensible one?  
  
Cell had good reason to wonder why no one had shown up yet. While certainly bigger than King Kai's planet, the Grand Kai's home wasn't much bigger than the Earth's moon (or lack thereof, seeing as Earth no longer had a moon,) and had several thousand residents. Of course, Cell had been stuck at a desk for a week, and therefore had no way of knowing that a tournament's planning had been in the works for the past few days. This one wasn't the extravaganza of the last, but still held the interest of dead heroes who didn't have much to do. Goku probably should have mentioned it, but since he had other plans involving Cell, hot springs, and sparring, he wouldn't have mentioned it even if he had remembered, which he really should have, even with his highly selective memory. It wasn't like Pikkon hadn't argued with him about it enough.  
  
Yesterday "Goku, you have to fight in the tournament. I need some competition." "Huh? What about Olibu?" "He has no chance against me Goku. It isn't even worth signing up if you don't participate." "I guess I see your point, but I've been planning my trip with Cell for months now."  
  
Arguing was all rather relative. Pikkon wasn't Krillin. While the bald monk would bicker about something for months, Pikkon knew when someone was adamant about something. His talk with Goku was about as argumentative as he got.  
  
The Piccolo look-alike wasn't one to be figurative, which was one of the reasons he and Goku got along so well. When he realized Goku had no intention of participating, Pikkon decided he wasn't going to bother either, which sent West Kai into fits.  
  
It was about an hour into the tournament that Pikkon noticed the air seemed to be vibrating oddly. He was in the audience, watching Olibu thrash his way through his opponents, and the atmosphere seemed off. His race had never developed ki sensing to any great degree, but the alien's senses were very attuned to his environment, and it often worked just as well in battle. (If this planet had seasons, I would think it was a natural disaster of some sort, but the weather never changes here.) A young woman with dark green hair sitting next to him suddenly turned her head and stared off into the distance. She looked at him. "Hey, do you feel that?" Pikkon nodded. "A storm is coming." She looked confused. "There are never storms here." "I know. That's what worries me."  
  
----  
  
Nione. If Cell were alive, he would kill Vegeta. What had possessed the saiyan prince to tell saiyan legends to the brat? That was the only way Cell could think of that Gohan could possibly know the name of the first super-saiyan. There was always the possibility of racial memory, but remembering specific names was taking that a bit far. Then again, this was the saiyan race. Who knows what the parents passed down to their spawn as a matter of course?  
  
Nione. If Cell happened to get through this alive. . . well, with his soul reasonably intact at any rate, he would never eat an onion again. Or rice. Or carrots, Kami knew it was at least partially Goku's fault for mating with a human in the first place. Earth was in trouble if split personalities were a trait of crossbreeding and Vegeta's brat got schizophrenic tendencies, though that alternate Trunks had seemed sane enough. Of course, there was no way in hell the saiyan prince was going to raise his son as a human, so this version of Trunks would probably avoid that particular calamity as well.  
  
Nione. Cell tried to detach himself, but any way you look at it, seeing skin being burnt off a layer at a time was not intellectually stimulating. All it stimulated was the pain receptors in his brain, and Cell mentally wrote down another line on his 'Where Gero Screwed Up' list. Why did the good doctor (insert sarcasm here) ever think that leaving him the ability to feel pain in full force was a good idea? He should have broken all the bones in that man's body when he had the chance.  
  
Cell wondered if Gero had left him tear ducts. Cell wondered why he cared. Cell wondered why he simply didn't use his Instant Transmission and escape. There was no where to go that Nione wouldn't find him. Some things were inevitable. Fate was one of them.  
  
. . .how interesting. It was indeed possible for androids to cry.  
  
----  
  
Saiyan bodies are durable. Even with the loss of most of their blood and several limbs, a saiyan will stay conscious. Goku had proved this theory when he was able to say a few last words to Piccolo after the Namek had punched a hole through his chest with that Special Beam Cannon. Saiyan souls are even hardier. Nothing short the obliteration of their entire bodies will keep a saiyan down. As it was, Goku was out for at least three minutes after Gohan disintegrated his chest. He awoke slowly, aware that he was dangerously low on energy, and probably couldn't stand up. He did, however, possess enough energy to prop himself up slightly on one elbow and open his eyes. What the saiyan then saw stilled him, and he finally understood why Vegeta had once so vehemently denounced the crossbreeding of saiyans with other races. Gohan had been raised a human, than thrust into battle expected to show his saiyan heritage. Goku hadn't considered the effects of this on his son. No conflict was in Goku despite his head injury, but his blood was pure saiyan. Gohan's two sides were fighting. Gohan's saiyan side had won.  
  
Gohan was no longer Goku's son. He was Kakarrot's, what Goku had been, but was no longer. Gohan was gone. Nione was not. Goku planned to correct that problem. He had to have a plan. A good first step would be getting vertical. Attempt one was a failure. Damn. Looked like it was going to take a while.  
  
----  
  
Nione smiled. The screams were not coming, which didn't please him, but the tears were, which did. He hadn't noticed them at first. Bent over in a probably instinctual attempt to protect his vital organs (futile, as most of them were probably ruptured already), Cell's face was hidden from view. It wasn't until some liquid (definitely not blood, the android's distinct violet life force was so bright in color you'd think it would glow in the dark) dripped onto the ground, that Nione knew the android was not as effective at divorcing his mind from his body as he would have liked.  
  
It had taken long enough. The android didn't have much in the way of skin left. The slow torture had taken a lot of patience, which wasn't a saiyan trait, but Nione liked to think he had learned something from his long imprisonment in the darkest corner of Gohan's mind. He had made sure to wait until just after the initial climax of agony before he started with some delicate ki manipulation to burn away the next layer of nerves. Considering how many layers of nerves there were. . . but a quick death lacked the artistry of what Nione was trying to accomplish.  
  
The half-saiyan silently walked over to where the android was crouched, breathing raggedly in obvious difficulty. Nione took a light hold of his victim's chin, and pulled the android's gaze up to meet his own, Cell no longer possessing enough energy or strength of will to resist him. Nione's smile grew slightly reverent. Yes, it was his best work, even overcoming their first encounter on Earth. The android was hardly an innocent, but two pathways of tears running down his face lent a strange purity to Cell's visage.  
  
"Beautiful." He stroked a thumb along the cheek of his masterpiece. There was a slight flinch. "Flawless." He tightened his grip, beginning to draw blood where the nails met the skin as his tour de force made a weak effort to break away. Nione leaned forward, readying himself. It was always important to leave a mark, or else some imposter might take credit for his work, which would never do. Passing by the ear, he whispered, "Gero succeeded. You truly are. . . perfect." He bit down. There was a chocked off scream. Exquisite, though it could not compare to the tears. Those were truly his masterstroke. It had taken a long time. This unparalleled marvel before him, his creation, had been worth the wait.  
  
A slight pain in his back, by the feel of it an energy blast. It didn't really hurt, but it implied things Nione wasn't ready to deal with. Someone was trying to interfere. Nothing made the demi-saiyan angrier. He whipped around, the android's blood still staining his lips and running down his chin. Whoever dared to try and impede him. . .  
  
No one was there. Even his father's corpse. . . Nione's eyes narrowed. Only a pool of blood remained where his father had fallen. That meant. . . the demi-saiyan's eyes widened, and he turned back. His masterpiece was gone. Nione felt his hands slowly clench, his nails digging into his palms with enough force that they broke the skin.  
  
Someone was going to pay dearly for this.  
  
-----  
  
Goku couldn't think of a course of action. The end result was clear; Nione had to die. However, there were several major obstacles to this, number one being Nione was technically already dead. Number two was that it hardly mattered. Goku was alive, but given enough time the blood loss would kill him. Well, not kill him, but incapacitate him enough that it amounted to the same thing. He couldn't think straight, could hardly walk straight, could hardly stand up for that matter. Cell wasn't precisely in worse condition, but something told Goku his friend couldn't be less help if he was dead. Even at full power, he wasn't sure that the two of them together could defeat the soul that had once been his son. Gohan had obviously been training in the three years since his death.  
  
It was times like this that Goku was especially glad he had hit his head all those years ago. Retreat wasn't in a saiyan's vocabulary. Goku hadn't been raised saiyan and didn't think like one most of the time, so as soon as the opportune moment presented itself (that moment being rather disgusting, as it occurred when Nione had been distracted by his seeming attempts at chewing Cell's head off where the android's neck met his shoulders), Goku took it, and quickly threw a ki blast that wouldn't have hurt Krillin, much less Gohan, therefore it didn't have a chance of even bruising Nione in Gohan, but it had the desired effect nonetheless. Nione turned around. When he turned back, Goku was already gone, and had taken Cell with him.  
  
He could not go to the tournament. The combined force of the dead heroes could conceivably slow Nione down, but it wasn't worth the obliteration of all their souls just to buy them some time. There was no where in Otherworld that anyone had enough power to stop Nione, and Goku didn't know any healers who could eliminate the wounds Nione had inflicted on Cell and himself. So Goku did something stupid. The number one rule of Instant Transmission, he had been told, was that you always had to have a destination in mind when you used it, or you could end up anywhere, most probably in the middle of space which often ended in a grisly death for those who needed oxygen. Luckily, Goku and Cell were already dead. And if they stayed where they were, well, there are worse things than death.  
  
Elsewhere. . .  
He didn't care anymore. West Kai's platitudes had rarely helped in the best of circumstances, and it wasn't the best of circumstances when you felt like your nerve endings were being burnt off. He wanted Babidi to die. He didn't care how that was accomplished, as long as his tormenter (and that accursed demon servant of his, Dabura) perished as slowly as possible at his hand. That was his first mistake. His second was letting down his mind shields. His second mistake was also his last. 


	14. Unacknowledged

Author's Note: My main conflict with writing this chapter was that I wasn't sure where Goku and Cell should end up. There are so many options that it seemed sort of stupid to write something without considering all the options. I briefly entertained the idea that I should make a crossover, but that was quickly squashed. It would cheapen the story too much, so instead our heroes are in the future. Well, the future as it stands, at least. To address some issues with the inexplicably large power difference between Cell and Gohan, Gohan has been training a lot, Cell has trained about half the time since his death, but the real crux is that Cell has been at a desk for the past five months and is out of practice. That and he was in shock because of Goku's apparent 'death.' Yes, I do know who Sharpner is, and yes, it was intentional. P.S. This is my worst chapter to date, or at least the one I like the least. Eh, some might disagree, but this one has a rather distinct lack of Cell. This is the second chapter running that he doesn't say anything, but this one doesn't even have him conscious. I also think the swearing quotient doubled from this chapter alone, based on the fact that Cell and Goku swear little, if at all. By the way, take a guess who the blond commander is. It'll be interesting to see who gets it right.  
  
Goku had never before experienced problems with the Instant Transmission technique, as those who had taught it to him were considerably weaker than he was and the power drain was negligible. It really should have clued Goku in that those of planet Yardrat used the Akachi'wishinaru (translation into English: speed of light movement, translation into Goku- speak: Instant Transmission) sparingly, if at all. The power level of the Yardrat-jin averaged at about one-thousand. Goku after losing a significant portion of his chest had a power level of approximately half that.  
  
Instant Transmission when used properly wasn't painful. Though it often consisted of going through areas of space most beings couldn't breath, the sheer speed at which the technique moved its users stopped any negative effects a lack of air might have on most people. Unfortunately, Goku had not used the Instant Transmission technique properly, and the resulting movement (or transmission, or hinaru, matters what race you are) felt rather to Goku like his skin was being flayed off his bones by blunt knives. When the saiyan and his unwilling passenger (well, not really unwilling, but he hadn't been asked if he wanted to come) arrived at their destination, Goku promptly passed out, due to a combination of power drain, lack of lungs, and the pain receptors in his brain being overloaded. Cell remained conscious as he had a rather high pain threshold, but he stayed crouched where he had fallen, staring blankly into nothing as his regeneration finally kicked in and his skin began to grow back, though much more slowly than usual.  
  
It was like this that the scouting party found them. For all intended purposes, it was an odd scene. A seemingly dead man with a hole in his chest a fist could fit through lying next to a crouched figure, covered in blood who was staring at a tree. It perhaps was even more disturbing that this was hardly the strangest scene the scouts had ever come upon. They were at war after all.  
  
Asuko walked up to the dead man, totally expecting to find him, well, dead. He wasn't, as the Calsu'jin discovered when he lay a hand across the man's mouth and felt the fallen figure breath. "Oh hell, this one's alive." Yami snorted. "Just our luck, another body to haul back to camp." Aiji raised an eyebrow. "Another?" He glanced at the bloody figure crouched on the ground. Yami grinned. "At first glance, dear brother, this one appears conscious, but when more closely examined," at this, the tallest of the Calsu'jin leaned over and snapped his fingers in the unknown albino's face, getting no response, "it becomes obvious he's comatose." Asuko snickered at Aiji's put out expression, but glancing again at the figure lying on the ground his already light skin paled. "Yami," Asuko whispered, but was ignored. The youngest of the Calsu'jin grew more insistant. "Yami, come look at this." Yami lay an uninterested glance upon the object of his subordinate's concern, but soon grew far more affected. "Impossible." "Impossible or not, Lord Piccolo isn't going to be pleased." "Or he might be," Aiji countered. "You never really know, with him." Yami snorted. "Like it matters. Anyway, Asuko, take the albino, Aiji, the corpse. I want to get out of here. There have been recent rumors of rebel activity in the area." Asuko laughed. "Come on Yami, you know no fucking rebs would show their faces so close to a base."  
  
"Unfortunately for you, your assumption is incorrect," a voice whispered from the shadows. Aiji's eyes widened as he watched his comrade's body disintegrate, and half a dozen figures previously obscured by the undergrowth walked into view. The person in the lead was a young blond girl in her late teens, dressed in army fatigues with her hair shorn, her eyes hard and unyielding. She spoke, directing her voice towards Aiji who already had the spiky-haired man thrown over his shoulder. "Put him down, before I destroy you as well." "Aiji, follow her order and I'll kill you myself." Without looking away from Aiji, the blond girl pointed a finger towards the tallest of the Calsu'jin, and a sudden ki blast emitting from the end of her finger obliterated Yami's head. Though it seemed impossible, Aiji's eyes widened even more, but he quickly put down his cargo. The blond smiled patronizingly. "Good boy." The last of the Calsu'jin managed to salvage what was left of his courage and speak up. "So, are you going to kill me too?" A snort came from the left of the rebel leader, and the speaker, a short haired brunette in his mid-forties, stepped up, smirking slightly. "Sorry, we need someone to interrogate, or the colonel will be pissed off. Since you're all that's left, you're it, buddy." Aiji swallowed. The leader jerked her head in the direction of their now prisoner. "Tie him up, and take him back to headquarters. Sharpner, Acel, help me carry these two." The two men who she had addressed nodded, and the long-haired blond, Sharpner bent down to pick up the man Aiji had dropped, and the olive-skinned Acel walked over to the crouched albino and shook him. "Hey buddy. . . woah, weird eyes." "Red, right?" "Yeah, how'd ya know?" "He's an albino, dumbass. It's a characteristic of the sub-species. Hear they're sensitive to light too." "Sharpner, shut up and move." "Right." "Um, do albinos also bleed without being wounded?" "Acel, what are you on?" "Well, this guy's covered in blood, but he isn't hurt." "Probably isn't his blood then. Or maybe it isn't blood at all. It's bright purple." "Acel, Sharpner, Travik, we are currently less than three miles from one of the biggest Emporium bases within a light-year. Unless you don't want to ever go home again, get moving! This is the last place I want to test out our new ki shielders." "Oh shit, sorry commander." "Besides," and at this the blonde frowned slightly, "the other one is of far more interest. Looks like the Emporium got a hold of some dangerous DNA. We need to get this to the colonel. Something strange is going on."  
  
----  
  
Goku woke up to find himself in a healing tank, or whatever they were called. He had only been in one once before, and that had been eight years ago. The saiyan glanced down, and pretty much got what he expected. The hole in his chest looked reduced to a mere discoloration of the skin, though it still hurt a little to breath. He heard muffled voices outside the tank, then it started to drain. Goku hardly noticed, as he had finally taken notice of who was standing outside the tank and couldn't stop staring. It was him. 


	15. Understanding

!IMPORTANT! An Alternate Afterlife will soon reach its end. I decided there are only going to be one or two more chapters, and then it's over. This is partially because this story is called "An Alternate Afterlife," and Cell and Goku aren't exactly dead anymore. The other reason is that I want to work on other fandoms, and I said I wouldn't until I finished this. Don't worry, this storyline won't be over. As soon as I stop dabbling in other fandoms, I'm going to get to work on "A Conceivable Outcome," the sequel to this thing. The cast of characters is going to be much bigger than it was in "An Alternate Afterlife," so it won't be quite so Cell-centric, but he will still be the main character.  
  
Author's Note: Discontinued the whole "Elsewhere. . ." thing. Quite frankly any more tidbits would ruin the story that may or may not be written before Christmas. Probably not, especially if people want to get back to present day Nione. I'll just go and write "A Conceivable Outcome" after working on other fandoms for a bit. I'm thinking Slayers. Once wrote a bit of it (bit being about 40,000 words) but the writing program I had at the time wasn't compatible with FFN so I didn't get any of it posted. Then I switched computers, and it all got erased. I can't say I'm sorry. One or two of the shorter stories were okay, but in retrospect the 32,000 word monster (titled rather unoriginally "Slayers AGAIN") sucked really, really bad. For a while I agonized over it, then chalked it up to a learning experience and moved on. Reread chapter 14. I made some minor revisions, so this chapter will make more sense. Again no Cell, but mainly because I lost inspiration and wanted to post something. Take a few guesses as to who the leader of the rebellion is. I don't think anyone will get it right who I have in mind, but if there is a better suggestion. . .  
  
Goku had enough experience dealing with possible realities to not go into shock at the sight of himself. It was rather apparent after about five minutes that this alternate Goku also used to unusual situations, though of a different sort than himself. As the tank opened, a rather subdued looking lizard-like creature handed him an outfit that bore a great resemblance to the one Bulma had gifted him with when he had entered the Room of Spirit and Time with Gohan, except this version of the saiyan battle-suit had black spandex and shoulder guards. The alternate Goku gestured for the newly healed saiyan to follow him, and Goku noticed one rather glaring difference between himself and. . . himself. This version had a tale.  
  
If Goku were so inclined, he perhaps would have started wondering what differences there were in the time continuum for this Goku to have a tail and it appeared some authority as well, as several beings bowed to alternate him as they walked past. However, speculation gained him nothing, so he didn't bother. The room they finally entered was rather small, and contained several scientist-types and the blonde girl who had picked Goku and Cell up earlier. Not that Goku had any way of knowing that, being unconscious at the time. As this version of himself sat down, he glanced significantly at the chair opposite at him, and not being nearly as dense as supposed by most, Goku got the clue and settled opposite him.  
  
"I would be rather interested to know how you managed to resist the Emporium mind shrieks, clone." "Huh?" The other him sighed at this. "I presume you do not know of your origins." "Well, actually I do know where I'm from. It's just you got it wrong. I'm not a clone." Goku Version 2, as Goku mentally tagged him, raised an eyebrow. "How interesting. You actually believe that." "Perhaps he was intended to replace you in a takeover," one scientist with a shock of blue hair suggested. "Look, Kakarot or Goku or whatever you're called here, I'm not from around here." The scientist looked up from their clipboards. The blonde momentarily stopped filing her nails where they had grown ragged in the forest trek. Goku Version 2's eyes widened, for the first time actually resembling Version 1. It was the other Goku who spoke first. "I do apologize. I should have made introductions. I am Colonel Goten of the Rebellion's Seventh Precinct." He smiled sadly. "You must have mistaken me for my father. I am told I resemble him greatly." The blonde spoke up for the first time. "And I am Commander Marron of Squad Thirteen, under the Colonel's command." "Ummm. . . wow! I didn't know Chichi was pregnant!" Goku gave the classic Son grin to what he now knew was his offspring and not himself. "Hello, son!"  
  
Again there was silence. Marron broke it. "Well, fuck. Isn't this from the twilight zone." "Sorry. I guess I should have told you who I was too. I'm Goku, your dad I guess, though since this is an alternate universe I suppose I could be Kakarot here." "My father has been dead for twenty-three years. He died almost a year before I was born, killed by the android Cell." "Wow, that happened in my universe too. If I did get Chichi pregnant any kid I'd have would be about your age." Goten continued to look at Goku. He spoke in a monotone. "Twenty years ago a monster that had once been my brother came back from the dead, and with his sensei, the demon king Piccolo, he then proceeded to conquer the galaxy and enslave all of the inhabitants." (Piccolo. . . well, I always knew you would do anything for Gohan. He's all you have ever cared about, bound to Kami or no.) Unknowing of Goku's thoughts, the demi-saiyan continued. "He gave all the credit to his success as a murderer to the one who unleashed him. The android which killed his father and released the bonds that held him." Goku felt the bottem of his stomach drop out. "This monster's name. . . it wouldn't happen to be Nione, would it?" "I doubt you are in an alternate reality at all, father. You are in the future."  
  
The demi-saiyan stood up and moved to the holoviewer which gave the appearance of the outside, for all they were underground. His voice was distant. "I often wondered why my father in the afterlife could not stop my brother's descent into madness. I thought I knew, once. The android had unlocked the darkness before you could save your elder son's soul, and they in turn destroyed yours. The only problem with my theory is why Nione didn't resurrect that which released him, but I thought it beyond the power of the dragonballs. But here you are, with no knowledge of what has transpired, your soul intact. I was once told of your Instant Transmission technique, but I had no idea it possessed the power to transverse time." He looked at the saiyan, whose features currently held an uncharacteristic grimness. "I presume it was the Instant Transmission you used?" "Yes, but the rest of your facts are somewhat skewed. Cell. . . he did release Nione, but that was unintentional. Believe me when I say Cell is the last person to want to release Gohan's inner saiyan." "You speak of the android in the present tense." "Was there someone with me when you guys brought me here?" "Yes." "Well, that would be Cell. But I swear if you try to get revenge on him for a slight he did not commit, son or no, I will destroy you. I have already lost the only son I ever knew. I refuse to lose my best friend as well."  
  
"Funny, I was always under the impression that your best friend was me." Everyone stared at the door in a stunned silence, but no one was more surprised than Goku. "Krillin?!" He sure didn't look like the bald monk Goku remembered. The lack of height was still prevalent, but a shock of grey hair and a large moustache hid any recognizable features, though the lack of a nose. . . "Krillin! It is you!" Goku shot up and seized the human in a bear hug. "Wow, with the wig and the moustache I never would have. . ." "Goku, you're chocking me." "Oh, sorry." Marron looked exasperated. "Dad, you know this area is restricted. Authorized personnel only." "Honey, I am not about to sit around and wait for my daughter and a kid I used to baby-sit not tell me anything." He turned to the saiyan. "And Goku, this isn't a wig." "Really? I thought you were naturally bald." "Naw, I just kept it well waxed. But really Goku, Cell? Aren't there some nice heroes up in heaven for you to be best friends with? I mean, I can understand you wanting to find a replacement for me seeing as everyone thought you were permanently dead, but I thought, well you know, you might try someone who hasn't tried to kill you." "Krillin, all of my friends have tried to kill me. Besides, Pikkon is pretty cool, but everyone else up there is scared of me and only Cell can match my stamina. Besides, he's a great sparring partner. You never really fought him, but he's got a left hook like you wouldn't believe." The formerly bald former monk rolled his eyes. "You have weird requirements for a best friend, Goku. And what about Bulma?" "The first thing she ever did when she met me was shoot me in the head." Something said earlier finally clicked in the saiyan's mind. "Wait a second, dad?" His eyes darted back and forth between Krillin and Marron. Krillin rubbed the back of his head sheepishly in a move obviously acquired from spending too much time with Goku. "Um, well. . ."  
  
"Dear, you know you should never enter restricted areas without me to guard you back." The saiyan got a good look before Krillin stepped in front of his wife, waving his hands in an obvious move to placate her. "Honey. . ." was as far as he got before Goku burst out laughing. Tears were streaming down the former champion of Earth's face before he managed to get a hold of himself. "Hahahaha. . ." Goku wiped his eyes. "Wow Krillin, you really bring a whole new meaning to the word hypocrite." "Hey! Look Goku, I don't know when you suddenly gained a vocabulary, but the circumstances aren't the same." "I may spar with Cell, but at least I didn't marry him. That's the only difference I can see." "Eighteen's a lot better looking than Cell, for one thing." "By the reactions of the female heroes up in heaven, I don't really think that's true, Krillin. I'm sure the story of how you two got together is interesting, but I won't ask if you won't." "Deal."  
  
"Besides the fact that the two of you shouldn't be here, I have some rather bad news for you, father." Goku looked into his son's face, and all the good feelings he had gained from seeing Krillin again faded away. "Something's wrong with Cell, isn't there." "Not physically. We thought so at first, but if the blood was his, then he already regenerated from his injuries, except for one strange mark on the side of his neck. He just won't wake up." "A coma?" One of the scientists shook his head. "We already knew before you told us of his origins that your friend wasn't human. His body can't enter a coma in the way humans can. He's catatonic, except his brainwave activity is actually higher than a human in a conscious state. Stimulants do nothing, shock therapy does less than that, and our psychics who work as healers can't get past his mental shields. He's very powerful." "But you can do nothing." "Not unless you have some ideas that we haven't thought of." Goku shook his head. He knew nothing of technology, and this wasn't a situation he had experienced before. "I don't, but can I see him, at least?" The scientists glanced at each other, but the one with the shock of blue hair sighed and agreed. "I suppose so. It would be difficult to make the patient's condition worse."  
  
As Goku and a few of the scientists headed out the door, Goten spoke. "Father, after you see the android, we have a few things we need to talk about. I have heard stories about your heroics, and heroes are something the rebellion has in short supply. And, well. . ." Goku looked back at the son he had never known. His voice softened. "Of course we'll talk, son. This probably won't take long. I. . . want to talk with you too." Goten nodded, and that was the end of it. 


	16. Mind

Author's Note: I decided Cell's going to be one of the main characters in "A Conceivable Outcome," but a lot of characters are going to be in it. It's probably going to be one of those stories where so many characters are essential to the plot that you only see a character every half a dozen chapters or so. It is more fun for me that way. This chapter started out serious and turned rather odd. This is almost a filler chapter as only the first thousand words or so really matter to the plot, but I actually really like this chapter. One more to go after this, and maybe a teaser of "A Conceivable Outcome" if I feel like it. Only one review for my last chapter is kind of pathetic. If you're reading this, write something, so I know more than one person likes this. It does motivate me when I have reviews.  
  
Jay Goose- I want to slightly revise my statement. I have the story up to the first chapter in "A Conceivable Outcome" mapped out, so you'll probably see the prologue and the first chapter of the sequel out pretty quickly, mainly because I really, really want to write that chapter.  
  
One moment Cell was sure he had finally ended up in Hell (except this Hell was devised especially for him, which made it worse, seeing as Hell in general actually wasn't that bad, but I digress), the next his mind did the sensible thing and shut out all outside stimulus. Whether this was due to the agony brought on by a misused Instant Transmission, or a delayed "your life is about to suck" signal, he didn't know, but for all intended purposes the android blacked out before getting to see where they ended up.  
  
Cell didn't dream. Whether this was due to the fact he wasn't programmed to, seeing as he didn't sleep (unlikely as sentients in general do dream, or at least hallucinate, and it wasn't programmed into them), or because his brain wasn't used to shutting down completely and hadn't figured out yet what it was supposed to do when all senses got turned off, the android instead found himself inside his own mind. If he knew more about Earth culture, Cell might have felt flattered, as only those who strived for inner peace got as far as he was in that moment (that or Raven from "Teen Titans," but she's half-demon so it doesn't count). However, all he knew at the moment was that he was currently staring at a desk that bore a remarkable resemblance to his desk at the checking station of Otherworld, and a saiyan was leaning against it.  
  
Cell glanced around. Besides the desk and the saiyan, there wasn't anyone else around except for a lot of white. It looked a lot like the Room of Spirit and Time, for those of you who want a visual, but Cell had never been there so it doesn't matter to him. "I'd always figured my mind would be a little more interesting than this." The saiyan snorted. He resembled Goku, though not to a great enough degree he would be mistaken for the Earth-raised saiyan unless one desperately needed glasses (or was Freiza, but he had a lot of issues concerning saiyans). "It is, though disturbing would be a more accurate adjective. It is about as orderly as one would expect, seeing as you were created in a test tube, but that puppy with two legs dragging itself along kid's play room soaked in blood made me wonder if I'd gotten the wrong head and ended up in Tim Burton's. No, I just brought you here so there wouldn't be any outside distractions." "Who's Tim Burton?" "A human movie director. His mind is disquieting, to say the least. Anyway, I suppose you want to know why I brought you here." "Not really." "Oh? Usually the people I contact desire some idea of my intentions." "You are a dead psychic of the saiyan race, here to contact me about Goku, who presumably is related to you in some way. You also absorb characteristics of the people you contact, seeing as no one talks like that except me."  
  
"You're smart. Good, that will speed up things. Though no, I don't absorb anything from you. I just use big words and complex sentence structures because it tends to impress people and make them think me a god of some sort, which makes things easier for me. Anyway, Goku's my son. I'm contacting you from Hell because he's in a world of trouble right now, and like an idiot he's going to dive right in because he thinks the best of people and wants to do the right thing." Bardock, for it was he, fingered the scar on his left cheek, and sighed. "How the hell I managed to spawn such a simpleton I'll never know. At least my grandson is a true saiyan, even if he is a little mixed up." Cell ignored the comment about Gohan, but he couldn't stop himself from rubbing the bite where his neck met his shoulders. "If you want something done about Goku, you might want to contact him instead of me." "He isn't out of it enough. I needed someone with at least ambivalent intentions towards my son who was comatose or deeper. You're the only one who fits the bill." "I don't like your son." "Of course you don't. You think he's an idiot, though for different reasons than most people. However, you felt betrayed at the idea Goku would take Gohan's side over yours, which tells me even if lack the ability to become fond of people, you are still able to trust them." "Is that supposed to mean something?" "The feelings people hold for others are qualities they themselves hold. If you are unlikable, you are still trustworthy, which is far more important and what I need right now. And stop touching the bite. All you're doing is irritating it. It's not going to go away." Cell drew his hand away from his neck, but glared at Bardock. "I heal from everything." "A bite like that has more to do with the spiritual and less with the physical." "What in Kami's name are you blathering about?!" "All you need to know is to stay at least one planet away from Gohan at all times." The saiyan shrugged. "Just a piece of advice. Anyway, tell Goku not to get involved with the group he just decided to get involved in. No matter how important he was in the past, he can't make a difference in the long-run here. Especially if he uses his regular tactics."  
  
"Are those pieces of advice supposed to be so incredibly nonsensical? Why should I stay so far away from your brat of a grandson anyway?" "Fine, go seek him out and get your head blown off. I really don't care. Just give my message to Goku." "I'm still not entirely sure I'm not just hallucinating all this." "If you didn't know who the hell Tim Burton was, you sure couldn't have made him up in your own mind. Ask Goku about "The Nightmare Before Christmas."" "The what?" "Exactly. If he knows what it is, then obviously an outside source is feeding you all this." "That seems sort of strange way to tell." "Says the android whose mind consists of blood soaked play rooms and adorable dying baby animals. The whispering child with no eyes didn't do much for me either. Look, just do it so I can go and catch the end of "Will and Grace." Radditz promised to tape it for me, but I don't think he really knows how to use the VCR." "Erm. . ." However, Bardock was already gone.  
  
----  
  
Cell watched silently as the white walls fell down to reveal a corridor full of rotting food and photos of laughing clowns. And the clowns were watching him. He sighed. "This seems more of a Goku nightmare than mine." "Who ever said this was supposed to be a nightmare? This is your subconscious, not an amalgam of your experiences and fears." The android glanced to his left to see an open doorway where there was none before. Leaning against it was Trunks. "You know, I never thought you had anything in the way of exceptional telepathic powers." "I'm not Trunks, I'm just an expression of him you concocted to help explain yourself to yourself. I suppose you could think of this as a dream, if you want. It amounts to the same thing; material expressions of your feelings and thoughts. Your mind isn't able to process them in their purest form, so they are filtered to prevent your head from exploding." "If you are here to translate my subconscious to myself, why Trunks, of all people?" "He is the only warrior of real intelligence you respect without fear. Or perhaps this is just fanservice to those out there who think this story needs more bishounin." "What?" Trunks shrugged. "Okay then, what's with the laughing clowns?" "Hell if I know, but they are kind of disturbing. Can you imagine walking down an endless hall of these things? Eventually their faces would become angrier and angrier, until. . . until. . . erm. . ." "Where are you getting this?" "You saw it in a movie once. Or Goku did. I think he left the room at that point. You got some weird memories from that guy. Did you know he once tried to eat a cake made of soap? Got three pieces in before his wife dragged him off.  
  
"This isn't an important part of the subconscious, it's just something you have in there because you never forget anything. I could show you more, if you want, though I recommend staying away from the darker parts." "What, like the bloody play room?" "That's barely counts as shadowy here. You're a pretty twisted guy. Kami didn't intend for four people to be combined at once, and Dr. Gero did a sucky job. I'm kind of surprised you haven't gone insane yet." "The only person in here is me." "You aren't much of a person, just a pale reflection of four different people at once. The only reason you have a voice at all is because a lot of those people's memories have been excised. Unfortunately, now another person is here, and he's got a much stronger hold on your mind than you do. You should follow Bardock's advice and stay away from Gohan." Cell felt a chill go down his spine. "Any particular reason?" "The closer you are to Gohan, the greater control he has over you. Right now you two are pretty far away from each other, so he is no stronger than you are here.  
  
"So, what do you want to visit first?" "Quite frankly, I don't want to be here at all. Tell me how I can leave." "No can do, amigo. A lot of people stay in the condition you're in for months or years. Some never wake up. Extreme trauma and all that. You can't just snap out of it. And as long as you're here, you might as well look around. A greater understanding of yourself will be very beneficial at some point." "Why do you think I don't understand myself?" "If you did, you wouldn't need me to explain everything that goes around in your head. So, what do you want to visit first?" "Is there a map of some sort?" Trunks rolled his eyes, but obligingly snapped his fingers to materialize a map into Cell's hands.  
  
It was separated into four parts, which only in the middle intersected. Trunks pointed to the intersection point. "That is you. Everything else isn't you." A 'you are here' red dot started blinking on the fringes of the lightest colored portion of the map. "Right now we are on the fringes of section Goku. The different shadings indicate who is what. The color is by the evil quotient. You can take a guess as to the descending order." "Why is it the parts of the sections closer to the middle are darker in color?" "The more you understand yourself, the closer you will get to the darkness." "It isn't very comforting that the only section that is me is pitch-black." "That's where Gohan has taken residence. Oh shit, there it goes again." Cell watched, slightly wide-eyed, as the darkest part of the map suddenly turned a blinding white. "In case you didn't know, Gohan is insane. He fluctuates between his two personalities all the time, but it's actually kind of deceiving. Gohan and Nione used to be separate, but they've long since seeped into each other. Now two sides of the same coin instead of fun house mirrors, if you want an analogy." ". . . I think I'll stick to Goku for now." The demi-saiyan that was not shrugged. "Suit yourself."  
  
----  
  
As they walked along the corridors of Goku, Cell asked a question that had bothered him ever since his talk with Bardock. "Which part of the mind did the dying animals and such come from?" "The whispering child with no eyes was all you, but the puppy and the play room came from Vegeta. Kami, was his childhood screwed up." "Care to explain what my subconscious is trying to say?" Trunks snorted. "I thought it was obvious. You have abandonment issues. Ah, here we are." Cell wasn't sure whether to be surprised or just completely furious as they entered a room that seemed rather reminiscent of a forest. "Abandonment issues?!" "Well, yeah. Ever wondered why you were so angry at Gero the first time you met him?" "He. . . oh." "You looked up to him, for whatever perverse reason, and as such wanted him to be proud of you. Of course, all you were to him was an experiment, and later an instrument, albeit an important one. When you finally figured it out, you were angry, but you kind of have an abused child syndrome. Hate your dad's guts, but still strive with all your might in the hopes he might feel what you want him to. And no offense, but you had it right when you kicked his ass. Gero was a complete sicko. What a Dr. Munroe complex." "What?" "Another movie Goku saw." "He seems inordinately fond of the horror genre." "Nah, Chi-chi just insisted on renting them all the time on the hope it would spice up their love life." Trunks smirked. "It didn't work."  
  
They finally entered a clearing, and Trunks paused on the edge. Cell stopped beside him, to observe a child sparring with an old man. "This is Goku's memory of the purest, simplest, most happy time of his life. He really loved his grandfather." The demi-saiyan and the android observed the young Goku attempt a roundhouse kick to the back of the old man's head, only for his leg to be grabbed and thrown bodily into the trunk of a nearby tree. "It really is too bad he was the one to kill the old man. But I wouldn't tell Goku that. He doesn't need to know, and it would only hurt him. He doesn't deserve that kind of pain."  
  
Despite finding his inner Trunks annoying and sarcastic, Cell had to agree with him on that one. They watched Goku get steadily thrashed for several more minutes, but then the two combatants suddenly screeched to a halt after Grandfather Gohan suggested lunch, and Goku lost all interest in the fight. Cell smiled softly as the two walked off, his thoughts elsewhere. "Goku hasn't changed very much at all." "Hey, that isn't true! I love rice balls much more than I used to." The voice wasn't Trunks. Cell startled, whipped around, to view a very annoyed Trunks standing next to an indignant Goku. Trunks sighed. "I guess I'll be going then, since your ride has arrived." He faded away. Cell regarded Goku warily. "Are you really Goku?" "Who else would I be? I'm certainly not Vegeta! You know, those psychics Goten had weren't very good. They said your shields were impenetrable, but a good fourth of it was practically transparent. You ready to go?" Cell glanced back at the clearing where he had viewed young Goku sparring with his beloved grandfather. "I suppose I am. I could always come back here if I wanted." (Not that I would ever want to. Getting to 'know thyself' is rather daunting, especially since Gohan is around. It's bad enough encountering him in real life. Seeing him in my own mind is something I'll never do voluntarily.) "Okay then, let's go!"  
  
As cheerful as Goku seemed, he couldn't help but send one thought out before they finally left. (Goodbye, grandfather.)  
  
----  
  
Grandfather Gohan paused in the middle of biting into a meat bun. Young Goku stopped as well, and sent a slightly worried look in his grandfather's direction. "What's wrong, Grandpa?" "I just thought I heard something. But it's nothing, Goku. Now finish your broccoli." 


	17. Separation

Author's Note: The people on each side are not going to be who you expect. I kind of have a feeling of impending doom that I'll get so involved in the characters that "A Conceivable Outcome" will turn into one of those fics that goes on forever and eventually peters out, since I really don't have a storyline thought out. Of course, I never thought beyond the next chapter for "An Alternate Afterlife" either, and that turned out okay. Expect a completely edited version of this up in a bit. -"A Conceivable Outcome" might have a little in the way of romance (unlike this story), some of which will be sweet, most of which will be disturbing and be more in the way of male/male relationships. There will be zero lemons. I can't write them, and wouldn't want to if I could. I know a lot of people don't like shounen-ai, but a serious lack of interesting female characters in this limits my options, and no, I don't think Marron is interesting. I have actually thought about the ending of this for a while now, and it looks like Cell will have a comparatively small part in the beginning of ACO, but it will grow progressively larger as the story goes on, seeing as Gohan's obsession with his arch-(I'm not really sure what Gohan and Cell are to each other, but they're arch-something) is central to the plot. Unfortunately, I have a beginning and an end, but no middle. Oh, well. I can only hope that one day I'll be able to plan out my stories as opposed to just writing whatever I feel like. -To address Cell's hostility in this chapter to the members of the rebellion, keep in mind Cell thinks humans are lower life-forms and hybrids are an abomination. He likes Goku. That doesn't mean he likes anyone else. By the way, I absolutely love how this chapter turned out. It's my favorite part of this fic. -On a side note: I actually drew a decent picture of future-Nione/Gohan (and of Goten, but he's pretty easy to draw as a kid). He actually looks like Gohan, but more older version of the-Gohan-who-fought-Cell and less pussy-wipped human wannabe of the canon. Too bad I don't have a scanner.  
  
This was the third version of Goku Cell had seen in the past hour. It really wasn't, of course, just three separate generations that happened to bear uncanny resemblances to each other, but at times like this he wondered whether cloning was so implausible. He wasn't feeling charitable. The mistrust in the room was enough to choke him, after the initial panic had faded.  
  
It was amusing in a morbid sort of way to inspire so much fear in people. The inhabitants of heaven were slightly wary, but they were more that way around Goku than around him, and it was hard to get a high off of fear when the idiot standing next to you inspired more of it than yourself. But these people. . . their expressions were just priceless, nevermind the fact that Goku was grinning like he had just gotten a life-time pass to an all-you- can-eat buffet. In that way, it was easy to differentiate between the actual article and his look-alikes. The Goku clone standing in the doorway had a look of passiveness on his face that seemed artificial at best, though his ability to control his expression far surpassed that of the actual Goku. (I would almost believe it, except hatred is so easy to read.) The expressions on the faces of the people behind Goku's impersonator, however. . . they were as clear as day. One of them was a human who gave Cell a passing feeling of deja-vu, but the other. . . (Hatred. Loathing. Terror. Hardly a revelation to see in the face of one of my former meals, but after twenty-three years? My oh my, aren't you one to hold a grudge, elder sister.)  
  
The android felt a feline smile slowly encompass his face. For a moment he considered suppressing it, but if he had to be around these lower life- forms, he might as well get some entertainment out of it. He was in a terrible mood. "My dear Number Eighteen, what a pleasant surprise. Out of all the beings I expected to encounter in the future, (not that I ever expected to be in the future) you certainly were not on my list, especially associating with. . ." at this the biological android shot a contemptuous glance at the human standing next to the blonde android, a human he finally recognized as the former bald monk Krillin, "humans."  
  
Though it didn't seem possible, the tension in the room actually rose a couple notches. Cell had a brief moment to wonder if an evil chuckle was appropriate at this point in time, before Goku thoroughly ruined the mood. Of course, being Goku (translation: thick as a bad pudding when it suited him), he did this in the most humiliating way possible. "Oh Cell, I'm so glad you're alright!" At this, Goku locked him in a hug that severely constricted the android's ability to breath. "Goku. . ." "After Gohan got to you I thought, you might. . . I was really, really, worried!" "Goku." "And after he went for your neck like that. . ." "Goku, stop hugging me! I can't breath like this!" "Huh? Oh, sorry." Sheepishly, the saiyan let go and rubbed the back of his head in embarrassment as Cell proceeded to cough up what was left of his lungs. After several seconds of this, Cell got control of his body but lost his temper. "You idiot! We're in hostile territory and you waste time on trivialities! Do you think at all?!" "Hostile? No one here is. . ." Goku finally took a look at the expressions on the others in the room, none of which could be described as remotely friendly, though a few had gained vaguely bemused expressions after the exchange between the saiyan and the android. "Um. . . hey Cell, you remember Krillin don't you?" The white-haired android glanced in the direction of the human who was still posed near the doorway, a confused expression quickly giving way to the look of a deer caught in headlights. "Vaguely." "I know you two were never formerly introduced. . ."  
  
"Father, now that your. . . friend has awakened, I believe we have some issues that need discussing." Another son. Another protégé for Goku to mold into something thoroughly screwed up. Fond of Goku Cell may be, but he had a low estimation of the saiyan's parenting skills. "I see you managed to spawn yet another half-breed. How nice for you." He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice. Goku still managed to catch some of it. He shot a hurt look Cell's way. "Cell. . ." "The first version too unstable for you to handle, Goku? Gave it another go? I can't see much in the way of improvement." Some anger, yes, but the sheer loathing that emanated from the eyes of Goku's younger son was definitely unexpected. "I'm nothing like that piece of slime who dares to call himself my brother! Don't you ever compare me to Gohan!" In the silence that followed, the feline smirk again crossed Cell's countenance. "Oh my, did we hit a nerve?"  
  
"Cell, stop it." The sudden steel in Goku's voice was similarly unexpected. He raised an eyebrow in the saiyan's direction. "Even if they do share blood, even if they are both demi-saiyan's, Goten is not Gohan." "How would you know? How long was I unconscious, Goku? I doubt it was long enough to get to know what differentiates one of your offspring from the other. The only difference I can see is that this one shares your terrible taste in hair style. Now, if you don't mind." He stood up, yanking the needles out of his arms as he did so. He walked towards the door, the inhabitants of the room parting before him. Except for Goten. And Goku. "Cell, Gohan is hurting people. We have to help the Rebellion stop him." "Goku, the only things I have to do are die and pay taxes. And that is a stupid human expression that doesn't apply to me." "Cell, Gohan is killing innocent people!" "Why should I care? And no offense meant to your bloodline, Goku, but there are no circumstances under which I would ever get within a planet of your maniac son." (Whether or not that warning Bardock gave me is genuine, Gohan is not. . . he's. . .) He felt his hand rising towards the bite, but forced it down. "Cell, no one in this universe has the power to stop Gohan!" "And you do?" "No, but we do."  
  
At this, the android felt himself go cold. "I don't care." (He will always be there. In my mind.) "Cell, I don't know of any way we can go back home, and Gohan is there as well. We have to stop him. We might as well stop him here." ('That's where Gohan has taken residence.') "Goku, we couldn't defeat him then. It's been twenty years. We can't defeat him now." ('The closer you are to Gohan, the greater control he has over you.') "We have to try." ('You should follow Bardock's advice and stay away from Gohan.') "No, we don't." He continued moving. Goku stayed where he was. "Get out of my way, Goku." "You may not have to help, Cell, but I can't move. People are dying because of Gohan, and Gohan is as much your responsibility as he is mine." ('It's not going to go away.') The saiyan met the android's eyes. "Whether intentional or not, you awakened Nione, Cell. We have to put him back to sleep, or destroy him for good." ('Gohan and Nione used to be separate, but they've long since seeped into each other. Two sides of the same coin. . .') "There is no Nione, Goku." This paused the spikey-haired saiyan. "What?" "There is no Nione. There is just Gohan. Just your son. And no matter what you say, no matter what you think you believe, there is no way you will be able to kill your son. And I am not willing to fight Gohan, Goku. What makes you think I want to fight him alone?"  
  
He stepped around the stilled saiyan. The only thing left in his way was the saiyan's son, who met his eyes steadily. "I never heard you were a coward." "I never claimed to be a hero." "You could help us. I have heard stories of your power." "You hate me, Goten, even more than Eighteen. You hate me for stealing your father, for taking your brother away from you. Don't try to deny it. Your eyes are too easy to read." "You're scared of him. Of Gohan." "Yes. But I have much better reasons for my fear than you do." (Or perhaps not) as a shadow passed over the demi-saiyan's face. "I'm still fighting." "I don't care." "You don't care about much, do you?" "No." "Do you care about my father?" "Goku makes his own choices." (Even if those choices get him killed.) "He cannot make a difference, but it is his prerogative to try." Goten's eyes dropped, and his stepped to the side. As Cell walked past, the demi-saiyan whispered. "He will try to fight Gohan eventually. And he will lose." (He will always be there.) "Gohan will kill him, when that happens." "Yes." And he walked away. (But Gohan would not kill me. And that is why I fear.)  
  
----  
  
As the minutes passed, Goten watched his still and silent father. Marron walked up to her commander in the following quiet. "Sir, we gave a ki shielder to the android. He will not reveal our location to the enemy." She smirked slightly. "Kind of weird to meet the infamous Cell. He's kind of like he was described, but in other ways. . ." "I know." Another silence. "Sir, we should probably report this to the command center." "Yes." The demi-saiyan let out a sigh he had been holding. "Yes, Lady Bulma will want to hear of the recent developments." As he left the infirmary, Goten sent one last look his father's way, but the one thing he heard before the sliding doors shut, was a quiet utterance. "Why?"  
  
END To be continued in "A Conceivable Outcome," if I'm ever motivated to write it. Expect a few surprise cameos on both sides, but not as the same characters you thought you knew. 


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